been so final,” Kathleen said, her voice breaking.
Daniel looked into his mother’s eyes and saw heartbreak, but he could barely sympathize. He was too caught up in his own sense of guilt, even though he knew it was ridiculous. He and Patrick hadn’t been given a choice back then. They hadn’t asked to be the ones chosen to stay behind. He glanced at his twin and saw that he was struggling with some of the same emotions. Because they’d been barely more than babies, because they’d been helpless and needy, they’d gotten to stay with their parents.
“If Patrick and I hadn’t been born,” he began.
“Don’t you dare go there,” his mother said, cutting him off. “You and Patrick brought such joy into our lives.”
“More than Ryan, Sean and Michael had?” he asked.
“You can’t trade the joy of one child for another,” his mother responded.
“But you did,” he reminded her. “That’s exactly what you did.”
He felt Molly’s hand squeeze his, but it was scant comfort. He looked at his older brothers. “I’m so sorry.”
Ryan scowled at him. “You have nothing to be sorry for. Don’t be crazy. You and Patrick were barely two when all of this happened. I can see why Mom and Dad felt they had no choice but to look out for you.”
“You can?” his mother said eagerly.
Ryan nodded slowly. “I look at Caitlyn now and know that I could never abandon her when she’s so young. I think about the way I was at nine and I was tough. The truth is, I did make it—not without a lot of mistakes, but I made it.”
“That’s what we counted on,” their father said.
Ryan held up a hand. “Wait, now. I’m not saying I agree with your decision or even that I can forgive it, but at least now I can understand it a little better.” He looked around the room. “I think we’re all pretty well wiped out now. Why don’t we call it a night and sleep on all of this, maybe talk again in the morning?”
“What’s left to say?” Connor Devaney asked. “I’ve told you what happened and why. I won’t spend the rest of my days trying to defend it.”
“And we’re not asking you to,” Ryan said.
“But we need to keep talking, Dad,” Daniel said. “I don’t want to lose this chance to know my brothers, and I don’t think you want to lose this chance to know them and their wives and their children…your grandchildren. Please agree to come back tomorrow.”
“We’ll be here,” his mother said, giving his father a look that dared him to challenge her.
Connor sighed. “If it’s what your mother wants, we’ll be here.” He glanced at Molly. “I don’t suppose you still have your grandfather’s recipe for waffles, the old-fashioned kind?”
Molly grinned. “I do indeed. I’ll make up a batch.”
Caitlyn, who’d been half-asleep in her grandfather’s arms for some time now, woke up in time to hear. She clapped her hands together. “I love waffles.”
“Me, too,” Kevin chimed in. “I can eat three of them.”
“I can eat more,” Caitlyn said.
Daniel saw his mother’s eyes turn misty. “Mom, what is it?”
“They sound just like Ryan, Sean and Michael and the way they tried to outdo each other. It takes me back,” she said. She smiled at Molly. “Something tells me you’d best be prepared to make a lot of waffles in the morning, but I wouldn’t be surprised if quite a few of them wind up needing to be thrown out.”
Molly squeezed her hand. “Not a problem.”
“Just be sure I get mine first,” Daniel said.
Molly rolled her eyes. “You really do need to learn to share,” she scolded.
“Yeah, Daniel. I’ve been telling you the same thing for years,” Patrick chimed in.
Suddenly the room was alive with teasing banter and laughter. To hear their wives tell it, sharing seemed to be a problem for all of the Devaney men.
Daniel leaned back and listened, suddenly content. It was noisy and chaotic, but he had Molly beside him and his family all in the same place. It wasn’t perfect, but it was real. This was it. This was the way a family was supposed to be.
And God willing, it was the way his family would be from now on.
Chapter Sixteen
Molly had spent the entire morning making waffles. Even though she’d been running Jess’s for years now, she’d never dealt with so many men with such huge appetites and the streak of competitiveness that seemed to drive them all to try to outdo each other.
Tired