with happiness. Lady Brice clenched me in a hug, Kile laughed as he cradled me in his arms, and the Legers stood with a hand on each of my shoulders as if I really was their daughter.
These moments felt so far away now. It was almost as if I was looking at another girl in all these photos. A little time and hope was all it took to change a person.
When I got to the pictures with Eikko, they stood in stark contrast to all the others. I’d taken off my cape and he was in his vest, and I realized that I had subconsciously posed us like two people in love. My hand rested on his chest as he held onto my waist, and my head was tilted slightly toward him, like his heart had a gravitational pull.
I stared at my favorite picture for a very long time, thinking how amazing it was that the photographer had captured the light in his eyes. Just hours after this was taken, I’d stared into those eyes, been held by those arms. How remarkable was it that I had this picture at all? Had it not been for the others, he might not have even walked over with me, whispering Finnish in my ear. I told myself that I’d been lucky we met in the first place. Had I fought my parents, had Henri not been brave enough to apply, had I moved my hand two inches to the right when I pulled out his envelope …
I took the photo and walked over to the drawer where I’d been hiding my treasures. I smiled, looking down at my little collection and remembering the past two months with a sense of gratitude.
Henri’s shirt that he made into an apron. Kile’s hideous tie that prevented world peace. Hale’s pin, stabbed through a scrap a fabric, reminding me to keep it together. Fox’s embarrassing stick-figure drawing. Gunner’s poem that I really didn’t even need on paper because I couldn’t forget it if I tried. These were the things I’d saved.
I stood there, the photo hovering above the drawer. As much of a treasure as this picture was, I couldn’t drop it in. There was no way I could put my Eikko in a box.
BEFORE WHAT WOULD BE THE most important day of my life could even begin, I was summoned to the Women’s Room. My mother could have held court anywhere, and I still didn’t understand what made some massive parlor her favorite place to do it. All the same, she had called, and I was coming.
Miss Lucy was there, and so was Aunt May. I didn’t know who let slip the news to her, but I was so thrilled I nearly bolted across the room to her. But then I saw that my beloved aunt was not the reason I’d been called. Miss Marlee was weeping into Mom’s shoulder.
She looked up and zeroed in on me. “If you didn’t want to marry him, fine, but why—WHY—did you banish him? How am I supposed to live without my children?”
“Josie will still be here,” I reminded her gently.
She held up a finger at me. “Don’t get smart. You may be queen, but you are still just a child.”
Mom’s eyes darted between us, unsure what to do: defend a daughter who was old enough to defend herself but her daughter nonetheless, or comfort a friend whose son was leaving her with very little warning—a pain she understood intimately.
“Miss Marlee, you have to let me explain.” I crossed the room, watching her crumple into a chair. “I love Kile. He’s become more precious to me than I ever could have expected. And the truth is, he would have stayed for me. He might have even stayed for you. But did you really want that?”
“Yes!” she insisted, looking up at me with red eyes.
“It almost literally broke my mother’s heart when Ahren left. It broke mine. Does that mean he should have stayed here forever?”
She didn’t answer that. I saw that Mom’s eyes were downcast, and she pursed her lips, like maybe she was only understanding this herself now.
“I know we’re not supposed to talk about the things that make us uncomfortable. Like how your hands ended up covered in scars,” I said, staring Miss Marlee down. “But we need to talk about it. It’s remarkable what you did for love, and I am jealous of and awed by you.”
Her face pulled together, tears spilling again, and I fought