have you in my life…for however long that may be.”
I didn’t know how long I’d remain a presence in her life, but I knew I’d feel her presence in mine until the day I died.
Needing to change the subject before I said something I could never take back—something that would undoubtedly ensure her absence in my life—I circled back to what we’d been talking about and asked, “What’s your mom going to do when you leave for college?”
She tilted her head the tiniest bit and regarded me with narrowed eyes and knitted brows. “I signed up for online schooling, so I won’t be going anywhere. I felt guilty about leaving, so I found an excellent college that offers the courses I need without having to attend in-person classes.”
Suddenly, I realized she was just as trapped in her life as I was in mine, except she didn’t seem to recognize it. Or maybe she did, but she certainly didn’t act like it. It was as though her sacrifices didn’t faze her. In fact, she portrayed herself to be different than me, like she was the one with options. But when I took a step back, it was clear as day that she didn’t seem to take advantage of them.
I grabbed her hand and pulled it into my lap. “Would you have done that if your grandfather wasn’t there?”
“Would I have done what? Taken online courses?” When I nodded, she shook her head and elaborated. “Well, no. I mean, I assume life would be completely different if he wasn’t part of the equation. I doubt my mom would even want me home if that were the case. But it’s not reality, so I didn’t really have much choice.”
“Of course you do. Why can’t he go to a home where he’ll be provided with ’round-the-clock care?”
“Depending on how much money he has in his estate, that might be an option, but until now, there was no way we could’ve afforded it. The only reason I’m able to go to college at all is through scholarships and grants.”
Hearing her talk about her life made me want to reevaluate my own. I’d always felt like a prisoner to the resort, chained to my family’s legacy. All I saw was a lonely future and a life of unfulfilled desires. But now, listening to how hard someone as amazing as Kenny had it, I realized I’d been looking at everything the wrong way. If Kenny left here having only taught me one thing…it would be that opportunities and hardships don’t define us, but rather our attitude about it all is what makes us who we are.
She could’ve easily complained about the added stress of living with someone who needed constant care or the hoops she had to jump through to get a degree, but she didn’t do either of those things. It would’ve been easy for her to have blamed her absent father for any relationship issues, yet instead, she accepted things for what they were and took ownership of her outcome.
Kenny impressed the hell out of me.
She inspired me, amazed me, and motivated me.
“What about you? Have you ever looked into online classes?”
I shook my head and forced myself to hold eye contact. “No, but after this chat, it’s definitely something I will think about. I don’t have a clue what I would go to school for or how I could implement a degree into my life here at the resort, but you’ve inspired me to at least look into it.”
“I have?” Her eyes widened with awe lining her forehead. “How have I done that?”
She made me want more from life, made me want to aspire to be more than I am, have more than I do, and become more than a carbon copy of my dad. But I couldn’t tell her any of that for fear of scaring her off. It was quite a bold statement to make, and I didn’t want to run the risk of her taking it the wrong way. So rather than confess the truth, I simply shrugged and said, “I guess you’ve shown me that it’s okay to make the most of what life’s given me.”
Her eyes grew impossibly wider, though this time, it was excitement shining back at me. “Does this mean you’ll reconsider your stance on marketing for this place?”
I couldn’t help but laugh at the way she practically bounced in her seat like she’d just won the lottery. “It doesn’t mean I will be able to do