and today I had lounged in sweats all day since I was working from home. And I had a stain on my shirt from where I spilled hot sauce when I was eating lunch. I tore off my clothes and rushed into his shower, turning on all the dials I could. I couldn’t remember which ones controlled what. He had one of those double showers that sprayed from both sides, but the control panel was in the center of the wall. I pressed button after button, screaming when water started spraying at me from hidden holes in the wall. Then the water started from the ceiling.
“Shit!”I hadn’t been planning on washing my hair. I hit more buttons, growing more frantic as the water pressure and temperature increased with every button I pressed. “You fucking piece of shit!” I shouted, slamming my hand against the panel. Nothing would stop the water and now it was too hot to even stand under. I tucked myself into the corner where the water wouldn’t reach me and started screaming in frustration.
The door to the bathroom was flung open and Robert raced in, panic all over his face. “What’s wrong?”
“Your stupid shower doesn’t work, and it’s trying to burn me alive! And I can’t turn it off, and then it started spraying me from everywhere!”
He bit back a smile and reached through the scalding water, pressing a button. Everything stopped suddenly and the steam that filled the bathroom hung heavily in the air.
“How did you do that?”
“I pressed the off button,” he said, reaching forward. “Right here.” He pointed to the big red off button in the middle of the panel that I had somehow missed.
I turned and glared at him, crossing my arms over my chest. “Well, if it wasn’t so damn steamy in here, I might have seen that.”
He nodded, pulling his lips between his teeth. “I know you would have.”
“Shut up,” I glared at him, stepping out of the shower.
“I didn’t say anything!”
“Your eyes said it.”
“My eyes?”
“Yes,” I spun around, pointing a finger at him accusingly. “You and your eyes are laughing at me, mocking me and the stupid, big, red button!”
“I swear, I was not laughing at you.”
I turned and heard him stifle a laugh, then spun around just in time to see him school his features. My nostrils flared in annoyance and I snatched a towel off the rack, wrapping it around myself. “I’ll be in the other room. Is there anything out there that’s going to attack me? Closets that’ll lock me inside or lights that will drop down from the ceiling?”
He shook his head, but I could tell he was on the verge of laughing at me again. Frankly, if the situations were reversed, I would be laughing my ass off at him. But since they weren’t, I didn’t appreciate the humor. I pulled on a pair of jeans and a sweater that would be easy enough to pull on and off. Then I slipped on my fake ugg boots that I only got because they kept my feet warm.
“Is that what you’re wearing?” Robert asked as I pulled my wet hair up into a bun.
“Is there a dress code for shopping for clothes now?”
“No, but I wanted to take you out to dinner afterwards,” he said, wrapping his arms around me and kissing my neck.
“Then you need to give better warning. After being attacked in a shower, I’m in no mood to go sit in some fancy restaurant.”
“Then what did you have in mind?”
“Do they have a Taco Bell close by?”
He grimaced. “Really?”
“What? It’s the food of my people.”
“Are you Mexican and I didn’t know it?”
“No, it’s the food of people that are too lazy to cook and hate going out to fancy dinners.”
His eyes twinkled at me as he crossed his arms over his chest. “What about Applebees? Is that considered fancy?”
“No, that’s dining casual.”
He nodded, his brows furrowing. “And what is considered fancy dining?”
“Anywhere you would take me.”
“I see, and what’s in-between?”
“What do you mean? Like you want a list?”
“Never mind. What sounds good for dinner tonight? You want Mexican?”
“No, I’m not really in the mood for Mexican.”
His brows furrowed again. “But you just asked for Taco Bell.”
“Well, I wanted to know if there was Taco Bell, but that was more out of curiosity.”
“Okay, how about pizza?”
“Eh, I’m not really in the mood tonight. What do you want?”