The Code for Love and Heartbreak - Jillian Cantor Page 0,92
everyone in the entire school is mad at me. But clearly none of these people are mad. Why would they be? They’re all happy because I helped them get matches for this dance. We might’ve lost the competition yesterday. But they’re all standing here together now, because of me. Well, because of me and George, Jane, Sam, Hannah and Robert. And even though we didn’t win, everything isn’t all terrible, is it?
“Hey, have you guys seen the rest of coding club?” I ask.
“I just saw Jane in there.” Liz points her thumb to the gym. “She’s wearing black. A long-sleeved dress.” Liz wrinkles up her nose a little, but picturing Jane in a long-sleeved ugly black dress makes me smile because it’s so...Jane.
I thank Liz, and walk inside the gym. There are so many people, and everyone’s moving, a swirl of colors: reds, and blues, and blacks. A lot of girls are wearing black. It’s going to be impossible to spot Jane. I consider turning around, walking out. But then I think about what Izzy texted me, to get over myself. And I take a breath and push my way into the crowd, scanning for a familiar face.
I see Robert first. He’s dancing with someone—Ben, I think. Yes, I get a better look. Definitely Ben. They’re both laughing, and they’re not mad at me, so I make my way toward them. As I get closer, I see the red of Hannah’s hair. She’s dancing with them also. And not too far from them, I spot the black lace sleeves of Jane’s dress, and then there’s Sam with her, dressed in a gray suit with a pink tie. None of them see me yet, and I could still turn around and run out, but my legs keep moving. I want to go to them, want to be with them. I force myself to breathe, to keep walking.
When I’m a few feet away, Jane looks up and sees me. She gets a weird look on her face and I can’t tell if it’s surprise, or annoyance, or anger. I stop walking, bite my lip, unsure exactly what to do next, or what to say. Finally, I raise my hand and wave. And then she slowly raises her hand, waves back. So I keep walking until I’m right next to them.
“Hey guys,” I say, shouting so they can hear me over the music.
Sam turns, and I expect him to smile at me the way he usually does, but instead he frowns, looks down at his feet for a second and then back up at me. “If you’re here to yell at us for dancing—”
“I’m not,” I cut him off. “I’m here to apologize. I’m really, really sorry. For everything. I shouldn’t have gotten mad at you guys for liking each other. And I shouldn’t have even come up with this stupid app in the first place. It’s my fault we lost the competition, and I’m sorry for that, too.” They stare at me for a minute, not saying anything. Tears prick my eyes as I think that Izzy really was wrong, and they’re never going to forgive me.
But then Jane lets go of Sam’s hand, and grabs mine instead. “I’m sorry, too,” she says. “I should’ve been honest and just told you how I felt about Sam. I mean...I guess I was trying to on New Year’s Eve but I was scared you’d get mad.”
“I probably would’ve.” I laugh. “And I’m sorry for that, too.”
Sam grabs my other hand. “E, our app is freaking awesome. Don’t be sorry for that. Look around us. Jane and I were just counting how many people are here together because of us.”
I do what he says, look around, and there are a lot of familiar faces, people who came to me at lunch to ask for a download. “But the two of you prove the app doesn’t really work,” I say. “You match Laura.”
Sam shakes his head. “Laura tried the second chance and she’s here with Garrett. They’re a much better match than we were.”
Jane shrugs. “And if we had more time, maybe we just needed to perfect the algorithm? Or maybe I’m the one who’s the anomaly? It wouldn’t be the first time in my life.”
As we’ve been talking, Hannah and Robert and Ben have danced in closer, and now Hannah is standing on the other side of me. “I’m really sorry,” I say to her, too. “I shouldn’t have snapped at you. I want to