shutting his eyes altogether. He rubbed at his brow. “Just a moment. I need a moment to think.”
“We do not have a moment. We have been over this time and again—”
“There’s new information,” Kai said, his tone harsh. Konn Torin’s face darkened, and he cast a suspicious glare at Cinder. She shivered at the disapproving frown—for once, this was hatred directed at her not because she was a cyborg, but because she was a normal girl, unworthy of the attention of the emperor.
For once, she couldn’t disagree.
If the understanding showed on her face, the adviser ignored it. “Your Majesty. With all due respect, you no longer have the luxury of being a lovesick teenager. You have a duty to fulfill to your people now.”
Dropping his hand, Kai met Konn Torin’s gaze, his eyes hollow. “I know,” he said. “I will do what is best for them.”
Cinder gathered up the material of her skirt in both hands, hope stirring inside of her. He understood her warnings. He understood the mistake he would be making if he agreed to marry Levana. She had succeeded.
But then he turned toward her, and the hope shattered at seeing the helplessness etched in deep lines across his brow.
“Thank you for warning me, Cinder. At least I won’t be going into this blindly.”
She shook her head. “Kai. You can’t.”
“I don’t have a choice. She has an army that could destroy us. An antidote that we need…. I have to take my chances.”
Cinder stumbled back as if his words had landed the blow that he had protected her from before. He was going to marry Queen Levana.
Queen Levana would be empress.
“I’m sorry, Cinder.”
He looked as crushed as Cinder felt, and yet while her body became heavy and immoveable, Kai somehow found the strength to turn away with head lifted and start walking toward the platform at the far end of the ballroom, where he would announce his decision to those who had gathered.
She searched her brain for anything she could do to change his mind. But what else was there?
He knew Levana would still start a war. He knew Levana would probably try to kill him after the wedding. He probably knew about more cruel and evil deeds she’d committed than Cinder did, and none of it made a difference. Somehow, he was still naive enough to think that more good than bad could come from the union. He would not stop it from happening.
The only other person who had the power to stop the marriage alliance was the queen herself.
A fist clenched over Cinder’s heart.
Before she knew what she was doing, she was storming after Kai. She grabbed his elbow and spun him back around to face her.
Without hesitating, Cinder wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him.
Kai froze, his body as tense as an android’s against her, but his lips were soft and warm. Though Cinder had intended for it to be a short kiss, she found herself lingering. Hot tingles coursed through her body, surprising and scary but not unpleasant, surging like electricity through her wires. This time, they did not overwhelm her. This time, they did not threaten to burn her from the inside out.
The desperation melted and, for the briefest of moments, the ulterior motives were gone. She found herself kissing him for no other reason than she wanted to. She wanted him to know that she wanted to.
She didn’t realize how badly she wanted Kai to kiss her back until it became quite clear that he wouldn’t.
Cinder pried herself away. Her hands lingered on his shoulders, still shaking from the raw energy inside her.
Kai gaped at her, lips left hanging open, and though Cinder’s gut reaction was to back away and apologize profusely, she swallowed it down.
“Perhaps,” she said, testing her voice before raising it loud enough that she was sure the crowd would hear her. “Perhaps the queen will not accept your proposal, once she finds out you’re already in love with me!”
Kai’s eyebrows rose higher. “Wha—?”
Beside him, the adviser took in a hissing breath, and a series of gasps and rustles passed through the crowd. It occurred to Cinder that the music had stopped again as the musicians stood and tried to get a look at what was happening.
A burst of jovial, tittering laughter split through the awkwardness. The sound, though filled with the sweetness of a child’s giggle, sent a chill down Cinder’s spine.
Pulling her hands away from Kai’s neck, she slowly turned. The crowd followed the noise