world had expanded so greatly that, on the one hand, he felt insignificant, and on the other, he felt the fascinating power of soaring in his imagination, regardless of what was happening all around them. His brother, however, seemed overwhelmed by worry and the certainty of constant danger, the anguish of what might happen to Moses, or the fear that their parents would no longer be at the only address they had for them.
“What will happen if we’re all alone in the world?” Moses asked, not looking at Jacob. He seemed lucidly aware that what they were going through was an agonizing flight from death, not an exciting adventure.
The question felt like an uppercut to Jacob’s jaw. He wanted his brother to remain unaware of the realities that were more and more unbearable for him. “We’re not alone in the world,” he said. “We’ll find Mother and Father.” His voice was firm as he tried to convince himself of his own words.
“Don’t lie to me,” Moses whispered. “We’re in a war. I know what that means. I also know our parents will have found out what happened to Aunt Judith, and maybe they went back home. So what will we do if we don’t find them?” His question throbbed with pain. His eyes watered, but Moses willed them not to spill over.
“We’ll keep looking. We’ll move heaven and earth to find them,” Jacob said, though he could see his answers no longer convinced his brother.
“For how long? What if we look for them forever and never see them again?” Moses finally began to cry.
“Well, I’ll always be here. You can’t get rid of me that easily,” Jacob joked.
“You’re an idiot,” Moses said, punching his shoulder.
“We’ll work, we’ll get out of France, far away from the Nazis, go somewhere safe . . .”
Moses looked up. “Is there somewhere safe for us?”
Again, the child’s question reverberated in his ears. Jacob wondered the same thing. Just over a year ago, anywhere their parents took them seemed like a safe place. But in that moment, everywhere on earth felt dangerous.
Their stomachs growled. They had not, after all, had any breakfast, and even though they had eaten a huge dinner the night before, they were very hungry. Jacob checked his backpack. They still had a few tins of food and some hard bread. They ate in silence but had hardly begun to digest the food when at the end of the aisle they saw a man dressed in black.
“The ticket inspector,” Moses whispered, pointing down the aisle. The boys gathered their things quickly and walked in the opposite direction. They went from car to car until they reached the last one.
“What do we do now?”
“I’m not sure how much time is left until Lyon,” Jacob said. Right then the train seemed to be going faster than it had the rest of the journey. They looked out at the ground whizzing by as they left the world they had known and catapulted toward an uncertain future.
“You aren’t thinking about jumping, Jacob.”
Jacob shrugged. “I can’t think of any other option.”
Moses saw a ladder that led to the roof, tapped Joseph on the shoulder, and pointed up. “I bet he won’t find us if we stay up there the rest of the journey.”
“But that’s even more dangerous than jumping off while in motion,” Jacob said. He was not a fan of heights.
“Come on, we don’t have much time.”
Jacob started up slowly, suddenly sweaty and feeling the racing beat of his heart. He looked to one side, saw the landscape rushing by, and felt like he was in a free fall. He took a deep breath and kept climbing.
Moses followed, pushing Jacob with his head to move him along. The inspector could look out at any moment. When they were on the roof of the car, they felt the full blast of the wind and the clickety-clack of the train. They threw themselves down, clinging to the top of the ladder, and waited.
The inspector came out onto the final platform, glanced around, then returned to the car, the door banging shut behind him.
“Let’s go back down,” Jacob pleaded. The terror on his face startled Moses.
“Let’s wait just a little longer,” Moses said. It was not smart to go down too quickly. The inspector could be anywhere.
“I’ve got to get down,” Jacob said, his face pale and his stomach turning over.
Jacob descended much faster than he had gone up the ladder and collapsed onto the floor of the platform. Eventually