it doesn’t count. It’s kind of an important fact to know about you.”
And here I was hoping she’d let it slide.
Truth is, I fucking loathe my last name. It’s the only connection I have to my father anymore, and I’d much rather I didn’t have any at all.
I tried to change it a few years ago, but when I approached my mother about it, I could tell it would break her heart if I went through with it. So, I didn’t. Now I’m stuck with it.
“Fine.” I tug her closer, and she doesn’t fight it. Leaning toward her, I vow, “I, Sullivan Scott, promise to be the best fake boyfriend you’ve ever had. If for any reason I cannot contain my dangly bits, I’ll dump you publicly and horribly so your parents will never be the wiser and I’ll be the asshole they can hate for eternity.”
“Oh, I like that. Nice touch.”
We pump our hands up and down a few times before dropping them.
Only we don’t part immediately.
She’s still standing close enough for me to smell the hint of apple and something sweet I know I love but can’t quite name.
Thea sticks her hands in her back pockets, her coveralls stretching across her chest. A button pops open, and I avert my gaze.
Don’t look at her chest. Don’t look at her chest. Don’t you fucking look, you perv.
She clears her throat, drawing my attention. “So we’re dating now.”
She says it so matter-of-factly, and I smirk. “I guess we are.”
“We should maybe exchange numbers or something.”
“That would be best. I’ll try not to spill beer all over it this time.”
“Good call.”
She pulls her phone from her pocket, taps in her passcode, and types my number in as I rattle it off.
My phone goes off just as she slides hers back into her pocket.
“That’s me,” she says. “I texted you so you’ll have my number.” She peeks up at me through the chunk of hair that’s fallen out from behind her ear. “Do you, um, want to maybe get together later? Not tonight, but maybe this week?”
Get together.
“I’d like that.”
“We could exchange those lists.”
“Good idea. The sooner we get all the facts memorized, the better.”
“Right.”
We’re back to standing around awkwardly.
Thea rocks back on her heels. I jam my hands into my pockets to keep from reaching out and sliding the button back into place.
She looks everywhere but at me, and I want nothing more than to study her, but it doesn’t seem fair.
“So,” she finally says after a long pause.
Another rock back.
“So,” I echo, shoving my hands deeper.
“I guess this is it for the night.”
“Yep.”
I stick my hand out to shake hers again, because it feels appropriate during a businesslike transaction such as this.
She moves in for a hug.
I knife her in the stomach with my fingers.
“Shit. Sorry,” I mutter. “My bad. I didn’t realize we were hugging.”
Laughing, she pulls back, sticking her hand out just as I go in for a hug.
We collide again.
“Fucking hell,” she grumbles.
“We’re awful at this.”
“So bad.” She shoves her loose hair back. “High five?”
She holds her hand up, and I do what any reasonable person would do.
“TURKEY!” I yell, shoving my fist sideways against her palm, sticking my thumb out to make a turkey.
“What the…” She shakes her head, eyes wide with shock. “What is that?”
“It’s a hand turkey.”
“I’ve never heard of that before.”
“Seriously? It’s like the best type of high five ever.”
“It’s…something.”
“I don’t know, Thea, I think we just found our cutesy couple thing.”
“Cutesy couple thing?” she asks.
“Yeah, you know what I mean. Every couple has one, like those couples who finish each other’s—”
“Milkshakes?”
I twist my lips together, scratching at the beard beginning to grow on my face. Damn, I need to shave. “Yeah, sure. Definitely meant milkshakes.”
“I’m kidding. I know what you mean. Like those couples who do yoga together and shit.”
“They do yoga and take shits together? Wow. That’s dedication.”
She huffs. “Sully…”
“Thea…” I say, mimicking her tone.
Slowly, a grin curves her full, dusty rose lips. “Show me the hand turkey again, will you?”
Slice Seven
Thea
Sully: Want to come over tonight?
Thea: For?
Sully: Sex. Obviously.
Sully: Or to go over our lists.
Thea: Oh.
Thea: Yeah, tonight is good for me. What time?
Thea: WAIT. To your house? Like…alone?
Sully: I do live alone, so yes.
Sully: Though I do have other reasons for inviting you to my place.
Thea: Sex, right?
Sully: Naturally.
Sully: Also, I live on a houseboat, and that’s what needs motor work.
Thea: You could have led with that…
Sully: Hey, Thea! It’s Sully, your fake boyfriend. Want to come over to