by the ear to her parents. Never mind our principal had turned out to be a Greek Gorgon and Nidhoggr the Norse dragon snake had not only been masquerading as a Parsippany middle schooler but had also tried to kill us; we were all about to be in some serious trouble with Yiayia.
“Kiran, Lal, get out of here while you can!” Jovi hissed, and I knew she was right. Zuzu’s grandma only had two arms, and while she was including me and Lal just as ferociously as the other two girls in her half-Greek–half-English chewing-out, she didn’t have a physical hold on us. I didn’t want to abandon my friends, but I couldn’t think what else to do.
“Go, Kiran!” Zuzu urged as Yiayia started to drag both girls toward the door.
“O-hee! Kiran!” Yiayia exclaimed as she saw what I was about to do. “Who that boy?”
“Thank you! I love you guys!” I yelled as I pushed off with my ruby-red boot, banking a hard right by the parking lot curb to get away from Yiayia’s grasping arm. I pedaled as hard and fast as I could. “Sorry, Yiayia, but there’s a good explanation for us being out of school! I promise!”
I’m not sure if she understood me, but the old grandma lunged, like she wanted to chase me through the icy lot. I watched helplessly as her orthopedic shoes gave out from under her, and she slipped. Luckily, Zuzu and Jovi caught her under her arms before she fell flat on her face.
“Go stop that snake dude!” Zuzu called as she supported Yiayia, who had begun her multilingual yelling yet again.
“Bye, Lal, come back and see us soon!” added Jovi, almost off-balance from supporting Yiayia’s considerable weight and size.
“Skipping school no good!” shouted Yiayia in my direction. “Kiran, you are a good girl!”
I had no choice. I felt like a total rat, but I zoomed Lal away on my bike before Yiayia somehow grew another two arms to haul us inside.
“Hang on!” I yelled as I flew down the service road behind Route 46, leaving my friends behind me.
A few minutes later, we had made it safely to Smarty-Pants Science Corporation. We got off my ridiculous bike and pushed open the front door. There was no receptionist in the outer offices. Instead, there was a dusty black desk with the company’s logo (a massive exploding supernova), a few totally mismatched office-type chairs, a chipped foosball table, and a miniature Ping-Pong table that looked like it had seen a lot of heated games.
“I guess space scientists like to blow off steam by playing office sports.” I touched a basketball hoop hanging crookedly from one nail.
Lal nodded. “Apparently so, Just Kiran. Although I am more of a cricket fan myself.”
After waiting a few seconds for anyone to show up, Lal hobbled over to the desk and called out a tentative “Hello?” Then we heard it. The telltale dum-dum-DA-dum noise of people playing table tennis nearby. There must be another table somewhere. From the speed they were playing, it sounded like some scientists had a seriously vicious tournament going.
Following the sound, I pushed open the first set of big double doors to our right. The inner office was decorated in the same style as the outer one, with another, much bigger Ping-Pong table, an air hockey table, a water cooler, and a sofa so comfy and worn I was sure it was meant for napping in between sports matches. When I realized who it was involved in the high-intensity table tennis game, I almost fainted from surprise.
“Bunty? Tuni?” I gasped at the sight of my tiger friend with a table tennis racket in their giant teeth and Tuntuni the tiny yellow bird on the opposite side of the table with one in his beak. But what really shocked me was who their doubles partners were.
Playing alongside Tuni was Shady Sadie herself, her bow tie askew, her glasses slipping down from her nose with sweat. She stuck her tongue out and grunted every time she hit the ball, like the famous tennis players do. On the opposite side of the table was Professor Khogen Prasad Das, the elderly author of the Kingdom Beyond textbook The Adventurer’s Guide to Rakkhosh, Khokkosh, Bhoot, Petni, Doito, Danav, Daini, and Secret Codes. He had his dhoti gathered up in one hand and was darting this way and that as he played, diving, jumping, and practically sailing for the ball. He sliced a killer ace, making Sadie slam down