knows, right?” Julian thought out loud. “Or Lady Death does—whatever makes those decisions. You did the ceremony, and you were able to summon me, right?”
“Yeah,” Yadriel said, still hung up on the previous revelation.
Julian nodded. “So, she gets it.” The corner of his lips pulled into a grin. “That’s pretty cool.”
Yadriel looked across at his statue of Lady Death on his altar. Of course she knew—she saw who Yadriel really was. She’d made that clear when she blessed him with his portaje. But he hadn’t considered that there was an entirely lost history of brujx like him. Julian was right; it seemed obvious now. There was no way he was the first, and he wouldn’t be the last.
“So,” Julian prompted again. “Why isn’t that enough?”
“It won’t be enough for the rest of the brujx,” Yadriel pushed back. “They’ll need more proof.”
“Not good enough for them, or not good enough for you?” Julian asked, finally looking over at him.
The question struck him in the chest. “It’s complicated—”
“Because—and I’m not trying to back out of our deal, here—but if this is just to prove yourself to them—”
“They’re my family—”
“Well, screw them, if they’re making you go through all this crap!” Julian snapped.
Yadriel was caught between wanting to defend his family and appreciating what Julian was trying to say. Mostly, he was tired and frustrated. He was tired of fighting, on all fronts. “It’s not that simple—”
“I mean, Flaca isn’t any less of a girl just because other people look at her and don’t see her as one,” Julian went on. “Just because she’s not on hormones or whatever, or ’cause she’s not ‘passing,’ doesn’t mean other people get to decide who she is. And the same goes for you.”
Heat bloomed in Yadriel’s cheeks.
“You don’t owe anybody shit,” Julian told him, stormy anger brewing behind dark eyes.
He was kind of an asshole. Julian was abrasive, sometimes rude, and didn’t seem to have much tact. But, for some reason, Yadriel’s heart still fluttered in his chest.
He blinked at Julian, not knowing what to say. It seemed way too easy, way too idyllic. Things didn’t just work like that in the real world.
It wasn’t enough to have summoned Julian, to have been bound to his portaje, or for Lady Death’s blessing to flow through him with its golden light. He needed to do everything the men could do before asking the brujx to accept him into the community. He couldn’t leave any gaps for them to question.
He loved his family, and the worst possible thing would be for them to shun him entirely. He saw how they treated him, and Tío Catriz. If they found out what Yadriel was up to, before he was able to successfully release a spirit, he was worried they—including his dad—would cast him out for good.
But how could he explain that to Julian?
“I kind of wish I could trade my family for yours,” Yadriel said with a weak laugh. They weren’t even blood, but in the short time he’d interacted with them, he could see how fiercely they cared for one another. Especially Julian.
“I wouldn’t trade them for the world,” Julian said solidly.
Yadriel smiled. He envied whoever Julian gave his fiery devotion to. It was a warm and unyielding force to be shielded by.
“They seem nice.”
Julian gave him a withering look.
Okay, so maybe he hadn’t seen much “friendliness,” except from Luca.
“Well, Omar seems kinda intense,” Yadriel conceded.
“He is.” Julian grinned affectionately, toying with the end of Purrcaso’s flicking tail.
Yadriel thought about all the rumors Maritza’s friends had said at school and Julian’s intense reaction. “Is he … you know, in a gang?”
His eyes snapped to Yadriel. “What?”
Clearly a misstep. Yadriel tried to backpedal. “Uh, former gang member?”
Julian’s laugh was sharp. “No.” He traced shapes onto the windowpane with his finger. Casually, he added, “But Luca was.”
It was Yadriel’s turn to balk. “What? Luca?” His mind spun. The sweet boy with the shy smile? It didn’t add up. “But—but he’s so— He doesn’t fit—”
“’Course he does,” Julian said impatiently. “They steer clear of Omar. Wouldn’t be able to pull him in without an all-out fight. Too much work. But Luca?” Julian shook his head in that frustrated way parents did when their kids did something stupid. “You saw him. He’s like a puppy—just wants to fit in and for people to like him. He’d do anything to feel like part of a family. He’s easy prey for gangs.”
Julian sounded annoyed, angry, even, but Yadriel wasn’t sure if it was with Luca