on the bed, poised either to push her away or delve into her hair and stroke down the back of her neck.
When the true kiss began, a muffled grumble of surprise or protest escaped from him but was quickly lost in his effort to continue breathing steadily. But not even Cole's thick, tested, glacial wall of indifference could withstand the sweet, melting onslaught of this girl's determined kiss. His hands did reach up and hold her at last, if only for dear life. When she finally pulled away with a heartfelt sigh, he felt swamped in a befuddled mix of wonder, desire, and dismay.
Suddenly, inexplicably shy and pink to the tips of her ears, Trissa glanced at her forgotten audience and stepped back to take the jacket Augusta held out to her. "Um, I'm sorry, Cole. It's just that I learned to kiss from a very good teacher, and I don't think he'd be happy if I let my skills lapse for want of practice." She flashed a winsome smile that held more than a trace of saucy mischief and was gone.
"Amazing," Fitapaldi said. "I have to admire her resiliency."
"A human roller coaster," muttered Cole, gingerly easing himself to the edge of the bed.
"Should you be getting up?"
"I have to. I feel like I've hit a brick wall."
"I think you have. There will be no budging that girl now that she's made up her mind."
"We'll see."
Fitapaldi lent a shoulder while Cole boosted himself to his feet and took a few shuffling steps across the floor. Using a chair and the windowsill to support himself, he looked out at the blank, blue sky. "I don't remember any of it. I don't remember her. I don't remember her father. Hell, I don't even know what city I'm in."
"St. Louis."
"Yeah, that's right. That's what the police said. Jesus Christ, the police. Duncan's son also rises. It's what I always feared. Should we plead insanity and get it over with? It should be easy enough to prove."
"You are assuming that you killed him. I don't think you did."
"Yes, Dr. Jeckyl may not have, but what about Mr. Hyde?"
"Do you really think that's how it is? You have a good side and an evil side and no conscience that bridges both?"
"I don't know."
"Would that girl have fallen in love with Mr. Hyde?"
Cole pressed his forehead against the cool windowpane. "I don't know. I don't know."
"I know. She would not have. There is no Mr. Hyde in you."
"Does she love him?" he asked, in a low, flat voice, devoid of emotion.
"Do you doubt it? She kissed you like that and you doubt it?"
"I have nothing for her."
"What do you think she expects from you? She wants to love you. That is all. Let her."
Cole's whole body sagged. "I can't." He slumped against the windowsill and Fitapaldi assisted him back to the bed. "There is a lesson in all of this, if you care to note it."
"What is that lesson, Cole?"
"Above all else, a man must strive to cast a pale shadow. Otherwise the shadow takes over. Tell me, Doctor, am I the shadow now, or is he?" He smiled grimly when he saw that Fitapaldi had no answer. "How did you track me down here? We did not exactly part with promises to stay in touch."
"You called me an ambulance chaser, I believe," Fitapaldi chuckled. "It's been a long, hard chase, but I finally caught up with you."
"How long?"
"Eight months. But you're wrong. You have kept in touch. And not all of your messages have been as cryptic as the last one." He withdrew a folded envelope from his pocket and handed it to Cole.
Cole examined the envelope turning it over in his hand. It was a prop from a dream he only foggily remembered. To see it and hold it filled him with dread. "It's my handwriting."
He opened it slowly, afraid of its contents, and what he read seemed to confirm his fear. "'I am not certain how long it has been since I've seen him. Maybe he is dead. Maybe I am. The day has grown so dark that I can barely see. Cole Baker'"
"Maybe you should hold on to this for the trial, Doctor. Tangible proof of insanity. What does it mean? 'Maybe he is dead. Maybe I am.' Or does raving have to mean anything?" Cole carefully refolded the letter and put it back in its envelope. "I don't even remember sending it. Except in a dream."