with a set of clean clothes in his arms. The sight of him calms me.
“Wow, Lex.” The tip of his tongue wets his lips and his green eyes are full of lust and desire. “You aren’t exactly making it easy for me to keep my hands off of you so you can rest,” he says, closing the window. “I hope you don’t mind, it was a bit stuffy in here this morning, so I opened the window to let some fresh air in.”
My cheeks flush and I smile. I was being paranoid after all.
“How did you get those clothes?”
“I keep a clean set in my car.” He gives me a sheepish grin. “I’m used to being prepared to not stick around somewhere very long.”
His reply reminds me of what he said last night before we got into the bath together.
“That reminds me, what did you mean last night when you said almost losing me was why you were nervous about more than just a one-night stand with me?”
Coen frowns and sits down on the edge of the bed. He places his head in his hands and sighs. This is a tough subject for him. Maybe it’s too soon. Maybe I should have just let it go for now and hoped he will tell me when he’s ready.
“I’m sorry, Coen. You don’t have to explain. I’m just happy you’re here and decided to stay.” I scoot down next to him and rest my head on his shoulder while placing my hand on his back for comfort.
I feel his back muscles tense and his body rise and fall as he exhales a deep sigh and runs his hand through his hair.
“No, its okay,” he says softly, “you deserve to know. If we are going to do this relationship thing, I want to do it right. No secrets.”
I nod my head in acknowledgement against his arm and just listen.
He wraps his arm around me and pulls me into him. He smells so good. Resting his chin on my head, we both stare out the window. I rest my arm on his leg and rub his knee with my thumb to comfort him.
Coen draws in a slow breath.
“When I was eight years old . . .” He swallows hard and pauses a moment before continuing. “ . . . My parents dropped me off at my Aunt Sarah’s for a sleepover because they were going to a wedding.” He gets up carefully, so that I don’t fall from leaning on him, walks over to the window and crosses his arms as he looks out. His green eyes are like glass. It’s like he’s not really here right now, but lost far away in his memories.
“They were all I had, Lex. My entire world. I don’t have any siblings. They were the only people on this earth to love me and they were taken from me in the blink of an eye. I woke up to the phone ringing very early the next morning, followed by Aunt Sarah screaming. They were killed instantly by a drunk driver when they were leaving the wedding reception. I never saw them again.”
I stand up and wrap my arms around him from behind, resting my head on his back.
“Coen, I’m so sorry.”
He shakes his head as if to shake the old memories, hugs me, and starts to get dressed.
“I guess that’s why I’ve always been afraid to commit to any relationship, Lex,” he says, slipping on his jeans. “In my fucked up mind, there’s a fear that everyone I love is going to get taken from me.”
Coen cradles my face in his hands and his beautiful green eyes look deep into mine, then he smiles sweetly. I’m falling hard for this man, and fast. I feel like we’ve known each other for years rather than days. This was meant to be.
“For the first time in my life, Lexi, I want more. I need more. And I don’t care what it takes. I’m going to do everything in my power to protect you. I couldn’t save my parents, but thank God I saved you. I’ll be fucking damned if anyone is going to take you from me now.”
I wrap my hands around his neck and pull him into a deep kiss. He gives me instant butterflies even with the slightest touch. I don’t ever want this feeling to go away.
“I want more, too, Coen.”
He smirks, gives me a kiss on the tip of my nose and squeezes my ass cheek