of herself. Leave it to Jane to call in the troops. “It doesn’t matter now.”
“Of course it matters. You have the right to seek justice.”
Her body went cold. Oh, she’d sought justice all right, her own very unique brand. But how could she tell her friend, even her best friend, that part of the story? Just admitting the rape was bad enough. She just didn’t have it in her to survive being a murderer in the eyes of the people she loved most. Pressing her lips together, she said nothing.
“Why didn’t you tell someone when it happened?”
Katy shrugged. “I was stunned, I guess. And then embarrassed. It just seemed easier to leave the place, and the experience, behind me.” She gulped fresh air and wished she’d packed a bottle of water. “And you know how the family would react. They would have tracked him down and killed him. Seriously. You and I both know that.”
“I guess I see your point, since that’s pretty much what I just offered to do,” Jane said, her voice low and thoughtful. “So, let’s focus on you instead. How about a counselor? You could talk to Birch.”
Katy shook her head, the refusal for herself more than Jane. “I don’t need counseling. I just need to make sure it never happens to me again.”
“How? By never going out with friends? Or drinking again? Or never dating?”
“It’s worked so far!”
“You can’t live every day in fear, Katy. You need to talk to someone about this.”
“I’m talking to you.”
Jane sighed. “Sounds to me like your rapist is no longer the demon. You’re fighting yourself instead.” She paused for a beat. “What about your mom?”
“What about her?”
“Are you going to tell her?”
Katy sighed. She couldn’t even let herself imagine that conversation, imagine a different cascade of emotions in her mother’s eyes—shock, horror, rage—not to mention how instantly protective she’d get. And what about her dad? Pillow talk was a real problem. She couldn’t ask, or expect, her mother to keep such a thing to herself. “I don’t think so,” she murmured.
Jane tsked-tsked like a little old lady. “Don’t be silly, Katy. Your mother happens to be one of the most wonderful women on the planet. She loves you, and I say that with a new understanding of the power of a mother’s love. She’ll just want to help, I promise.”
“Yeah, she’ll want to help me right back into my old life in Pine Creek,” Katy muttered. “She and Dad have been celebrating my independence as much as I have. I can’t let them know I didn’t keep myself safe.” Her voice broke on that last word, and she pressed her hand to her mouth.
“It won’t be like that. Please take it from another mother.”
The width of Katy’s smile made her cheeks hurt, and her eyes brimmed with the gratitude she couldn’t properly express. Though the telling made her feel like a completely new person, she also knew she’d taken the sharing about as far as she could. What mattered most was her ability to move on, to find the strength to get back on her feet and never fall in the same trap again. Never hesitate or back down. That’s what her father taught her, wasn’t it?
“I’ll find a way to tell her, I promise.” Katy got to her feet and started walking toward home, unable to bear the emotion roaring its way through her body. Gratitude and guilt couldn’t sit with each other for long, but all this truth-telling had left her a bit too worn out to choose a winner. Once she’d recharged, she’d call Jane again. They both deserved to giggle over the good stuff.
Chapter Fourteen
Gunnar allowed himself a small smile, more pleased with himself than he’d been in at least a week. This was a good idea, assigning Katy to fire inspection duty at the campground. If she saw through his ruse, or if she thought it suspicious that he gave himself the same duty, there were no hints to be found in those haunting gray eyes.
The day’s heat intensified on his shoulders, and he glanced at his watch. Lunchtime. Perfect. They’d been mostly working in silence all morning, moving from campsite to campsite and ensuring each fire pit was properly maintained, showed no residue of inappropriate burning, and had all the necessary safety equipment nearby. But now, with the sun high and his stomach growling, it was finally time to try to get past some of this blasted awkwardness pulsing between them.
“Let’s take a