And we women know how to keep secrets, don’t we?”
“I know you’re good at keeping secrets,” Natalie tells me. “I mean, Joel still doesn’t know that you’re seeing someone even though I was afraid that he would find out earlier.”
I give her a puzzled look. “Earlier?”
“I was looking for you downstairs just before the program started,” she explains. “Joel went to look for you. I was afraid he’d find you kissing a guy in some corner or walk in while you…”
She stops.
“While I was having sex with someone?” I finish her sentence.
She nods. “I’m glad he didn’t.”
Me too. I’m glad he didn’t walk in while I was kissing Ryker.
I glance at her. “You’re good at keeping secrets, too. You haven’t told Joel that I’m sleeping with someone.”
“I’m not.” Natalie sighs. “I told Ryker.”
“What?”
“When Joel was looking for you, I slipped and told Ryker.”
I see. So that’s how Ryker knew I told Natalie I was sleeping with someone, which is the same thing he told Joel. It’s almost funny.
Natalie grabs my hand. “I’m sorry, Claire.”
I shake my head. “It’s okay. It’s just Ryker.”
“But he might tell Joel.” I hear the worry in Natalie’s voice.
She slaps her forehead.
“Damn it. I should have asked him not to tell Joel.”
My eyebrows arch. I haven’t heard Natalie curse before. Is it because she’s drunk? I know I am. A little. If someone asked me to walk a straight line right now, I don’t think I’d be able to.
Natalie gets up. “Maybe I should call Ryker right now. You have his number, don’t you?”
I shake my head again. “You don’t have to.”
“It’s too late, isn’t it?” Her forehead furrows as she touches her chin. “It’s too late. He could have already told Joel while they were having their party.”
“No, he didn’t.”
“But if he did, you’d be in trouble.” Natalie grips her hair as she starts pacing the floor. “Oh my god. I can’t believe I got you in trouble.”
Okay. She’s drunk. She’s talking and worrying way too much.
“Natalie…”
She looks at me. “But don’t worry. I promise I have your back. I promise I won’t let him—”
“Natalie!”
I sit up and raise my voice because I can’t take her whining anymore. Then I reach for her hand.
“Natalie, it’s okay. Ryker didn’t tell Joel. He won’t.”
She gives me a puzzled look. “But how can you be so sure?”
I scratch the back of my head. I guess the only way for me to put her mind at ease is to tell her about Ryker and me. But can I trust her not to tell Joel? She just admitted she’s not good at keeping secrets.
Still, at least she didn’t spill the beans to Joel even though I’m sure she had plenty of opportunities. Besides, given all the remorse she’s feeling now, she’s bound to be more careful in the future, right?
Everyone deserves a second chance. Also, I need someone to confide in or I might end up being the one telling Joel. Sometimes, I just get the urge to do it anyway. Why do I have to keep my relationship with Ryker a secret when we’re not doing anything wrong? I’m not a minor. I’m not Ryker’s sister. He’s not married. I’m not married. He’s not a priest. He’s not royalty. Neither of us have any weird diseases. So why are we hiding?
The only reason I keep quiet is because I told Ryker I would. I told him I’d give him a chance to tell Joel about us and I told him I’d wait until after the wedding.
But I didn’t say anything about not telling anyone else. And I’ve been wanting to tell Natalie my secret for a long time. I can’t contain it any longer.
I look into her eyes. “Do you promise me, Natalie, that you won’t tell anyone what I’m going to tell you?”
Her eyes grow wide. “You’re going to tell me another secret?”
“Do you swear on your honor as… the bride who asked me to be her maid of honor? As my future sister-in-law?”
Natalie doesn’t answer. She just sits on the edge of her bed and looks at her lap.
I sit beside her. “Natalie, can I trust you to keep another secret?”
I can decide to trust her, but that won’t mean anything if she can’t trust herself.
Finally, she looks at me. She nods and takes my hand.
“You can. I promise I won’t tell. I won’t fail you again.”
I smile. “I know you won’t.”
Then I draw a deep breath. Here we go.
“It’s Ryker.”
Natalie says nothing. I realize she’s waiting