I want you back. You and I, we’re so good together.”
My brain finally gets the upper hand on my too-sentimental gut and I turn away, breaking the contact between us. “No,” I say, shaking my head from side to side, “we were not good together. You cheated on me and I couldn’t trust you.”
“Listen, I made a mistake, and it’s one I will never make again.”
I look over at him. His shoulders are hunched forward and his mouth is turned down in disappointment. His appearance, his words, they sound so sincere. But when I look into his eyes, his piercing blue eyes that lied so effortlessly to me, I know he’s still holding something back.
“Please, Ellie. Just give me another chance.”
I open my mouth to refute him, to tell him to leave me alone, but Luanne beats me to it.
“Like hell she will.” Luanne stomps into the room and comes to stand beside me, fists clenched on her hips and face harder than stamped-concrete.
“Luanne,” Tim starts, “just give me a—”
“I’ll give you about ten seconds to get the hell out of my apartment before I forget my Southern manners and make you cry like a little girl.”
Tim, hands held up in defense, looks to me for help. God, I’m so weak. I can’t help it. There’s still a part of me that wants him. It doesn’t make any sense and it’s wrong but there it is. I look over at Luanne and her eyes roll back in exasperation, maybe disgust. She shoots Tim a hate-filled stare then disappears back into the bedroom.
The door slamming behind her makes me jump, and I wrap my arms tightly around myself. I feel cold and ridiculous standing here in front of him in nothing but thin silk. I feel the sear of his eyes as he stares at me across the coffee table. He shuffles his feet and I chance a look in his direction. He’s not smiling anymore. He looks frustrated and his body is tense with emotion. I look away before he can suck me in further.
I want to tell him he ruined everything, ruined my happily ever after and any hope that I’ll ever be able to find it. I want to tell him that he and Suzy can have each other and that I’m better off without him, but the words won’t come. Instead I’m just standing there, silent and vulnerable. It’s not until Tim brings a hand up to cup my cheek that I realize he’s moved. He wipes the pad of a thumb across my cheek and I feel the trail of wetness it leaves behind. I break, finally giving in to the pain I’ve worked so hard to forget.
He gently tilts my head back to look into my eyes. He’s not crying but his eyes are wet and it’s the first time I’ve ever seen anything like sadness mar his perfect good looks. “Ellie, I think…I think I’m in love with you.”
I must be dreaming because I’m pretty sure Tim just told me he loves me. Well, he thinks he loves me. “What?” I choke.
“I said, I think I’m in love with you.”
Over the course of our eleven months together, Tim never once uttered the word love. Whenever I said I loved him, he mostly responded with, “Ditto, babe.” For a long time I thought it was his way of saying he loved me too, but toward the end I knew he was just avoiding the conversation and probably the promise of a commitment to me.
“I want you back, babe. Come home with me, it’s been long enough.” He moves forward, pulling me in close and wrapping his arms tightly around me, trapping me. I’m like a doe in headlights; I know if I don’t move I’m going to end up as Tim’s new hood ornament, but the lights, they’re so pretty…
“Just get your things and let’s go home. We can put all of this behind us,” he says in a soothing voice.
The thought of going back to the apartment, to the defiled leather furniture, brings me out of my stupor. “No, no, I can’t go back with you,” I say, shaking my head, breaking away from him and moving to the other end of the small room.
“Yes, you can. You and I belong together and I’m not going to let you get away again.”
“Get away? Tim, you slept with our neighbor, in our apartment. I didn’t get away, you pushed me away.” I wipe the tears