That sounded like the kind of information my grandfather wanted. I wondered if I should just grab Folsom and take him back.
But, well, Grandfather wouldn’t be back to the castle for hours yet. Besides, I was no errand boy. I hadn’t simply come to fetch Folsom and then sit around and wait. Alcatraz Smedry, brave vacuum cleaner rider and wearer of the awesome sombrero, didn’t stand for things like that. He was a man of action!
‘I want to meet with some of these Librarians,’ I found myself saying. ‘Where can we find them?’
Folsom looked concerned. ‘Well, I guess we could head to the embassy.’
‘Isn’t there somewhere else we could find them? Someplace a little more neutral?’
‘There will probably be some at the prince’s lunch party.’ Himalaya said.
‘Yeah,’ Folsom said. ‘But how will we get into that? You have to RSVP months in advance.’
I stood up, making a decision. ‘Let’s go. Don’t worry about getting us in – I’ll handle that.’
7
Okay, go back and reread the introductions to chapters two, five, and six. Don’t worry, I can wait. I’ll go make some popcorn.
Pop. Pop-pop. Pop-pop-pop. Pop. POP!
What, done already? You must not have read very carefully. Go back and do it again.
Munch. Munch-munch. Munch-munch-munch. Munch. Crunch.
Okay, that’s better. You should have read about:
Fish sticks
Several things you can do to fight the Librarians
Mental hospitals that are really churches
The connection between these three things should be readily obvious to you:
Socrates.
Socrates was a funny little Greek man best known for forgetting to write things down and for screaming, ‘Look, I’m a philosopher!’ in the middle of a No Philosophy zone. (He was later forced to eat his words. Along with some poison.)
Socrates was the inventor of something very important: the question. That’s right, before Socrates, languages had no ability to ask questions. Conversations went like this:
Blurg: ‘Gee, I wish there were a way I could speak to Grug and see if he’s feeling all right.’
Grug: ‘By the tone of your voice, I can tell that you are curious about my health. Since I just dropped this rock on my foot, I would like to request your help.’
Blurg: ‘Alas, though our language has developed the imperative form, we have yet to discover a method of using the interrogative. If only there were a simple way to ease communication between us.’ Grug: ‘I see that a Pteroydeactyl has begun to chew on your head.’
Blurg: ‘Yes, you are quite right. Ouch.’
Fortunately, Socrates eventually came along and invented the question, allowing people like Blurg and Grug to speak in a way that wasn’t quite so awkward.
All right, I’m lying. Socrates didn’t invent the question. But he did popularize it through something we call the Socratic method. In addition, he taught people to ask questions about everything. To take nothing for granted.
Ask. Wonder. Think.
And that’s the final thing you can do to help fight the evil Librarians. That, and buy lots of my books. (Or did I mention that one already?)
‘So, who’s this prince that’s throwing the party?’ I asked as Folsom, Himalaya, and I traveled by carriage.