seem vaguely familiar, and she mentioned to Kiyo about the garden she’d seen in her visions. He said there were many Japanese gardens, and if there was nothing specific that stood out for her, they couldn’t be sure this was the one from her vision.
“Hopefully not,” he replied unexpectedly to her comment about having a vision. “We’ll be in the mountains for three days. Full moon phase.”
Of course.
Right.
Niamh frowned. “We didn’t check out of the hotel. Are you telling me you’re paying for that room for three days when we’re not even there?”
“It’s no big deal.”
It was a big deal. Kiyo wasn’t the type to splash the cash like that. “We should have checked out.”
“As long as we’re checked in, anyone who wants to know we’re in Tokyo will think we’re still in the city.”
True.
“At least let me pay for my half.”
Kiyo snorted. “And have you rob a bank to do it?”
Her cheeks colored. Even though she knew it wasn’t a dig, it only reminded her that she hadn’t done anything honorable to earn money. When Thea was on the run and on her own, she’d worked every menial job under the sun to pay her own way. She stayed in shitty apartments all over Europe. Niamh had never sacrificed like that.
“Hey …” Kiyo’s voice softened. “I didn’t mean anything by it.”
“I know. Still, I should probably think about getting a proper job at some point. Putting some money away. Money I’ve earned.”
“You have a job. An important one. Don’t forget it.”
Soothed somewhat, she shot him a smile he couldn’t see because he was focused on the road ahead.
They fell into companionable silence for a while, and Niamh took in the city as they drove through. They slowed in the heavy traffic. Catching sight of a sign that had a wolf painted on it, Niamh thought about the reason for their flight into the woods.
“What’s it like?” she blurted out.
“What?”
“The call of the moon?”
He flicked her an amused, questioning look.
She shrugged. “I’ve never had the chance to converse with a werewolf long enough to ask. I mean, you have to turn on a full moon, right?”
“Yeah, there’s no stopping it.”
“So what does it feel like?”
Kiyo seemed to consider this. “Physically, it’s like this tingling sensation down my spine. A burning tingle. It’s a pleasure pain. The first time I was forced to turn, it was frightening to not have control over my body. To feel it changing and not be able to stop it. But after a while, the fear went away. I feel connected to the universe during a full moon in a way I don’t otherwise. Like the moon and I are bonded. Like it rejoices in my running wild in my wolf form. It’s freeing. To soar and leap and be at one with the woods and the earth and the animals. The human part of me might lose control of its body but the wolf is in control of every veer and jump and swerve through the trees.”
Something warm and full of anticipation moved through her. “It sounds … awesome.”
Kiyo threw her a quick grin.
“You don’t resent being a wolf, then?”
He shook his head. “Strangely not. When I was first bitten, I didn’t want it. I was afraid of it. But eventually—and by eventually, I mean quite a few years later—I started to give into it. When I did, I realized that being a werewolf had freed me.”
“Freed you?”
“When I was human, I was always treated as if I was different because of my mother’s supposed shame. Children who should have been friends used me as target practice. Adults veered between treating me as if I were invisible or as if I were less than an animal to them. It got better as I got older, living in Tokyo away from the past. But I never quite felt myself. Or that I belonged, no matter how people tried to make me feel like I belonged.
“Being awoken to the supernatural world, becoming a werewolf … I was finally able to let go of the idea that being different was something to be ashamed of. I let go of all the shit that had screwed with my head for years. It was freeing, and I might have been happy as a wolf.”
Niamh heard the underlying sadness in his voice and guessed, “If you hadn’t been cursed with immortality?”
“Yeah.”
“Will you tell about me about it, Kiyo? Will you tell me the rest of your story?”
He slowed the car to