He thought he took everything from me … but he didn’t take you, and you’re all that fucking matters. So I’m okay. It’ll get easier, Doe.”
He had lied. To protect me.
I nodded, despite the nausea in my gut. “I’m in.”
The tension drained out of Jamie, and he turned the ignition. Strained silence settled between us as he drove back toward the studio. Jake, the security guard, waved us through. Jamie parked near the soundstage door.
I unclipped my seat belt.
“If you tell me why you and Asher Steadman have been pretending to be in a relationship, maybe I can try to trust you again.”
Disbelief stopped my departure. It really felt like Jamie had rewritten our history. He acted like I was the one who had broken up with him. “It’s not my secret to tell. And I’m not the one in this relationship that broke us. I don’t need to win back your trust. It’s the other way around, Jamie.”
His eyebrows hit his hairline and he let out a bark of incredulous laughter. “I broke your trust? You want me to trust you when you’re protecting Asher Steadman over me?”
I shook my head at the childish dig. “It’s not like that. I can’t tell you. Not because I don’t want to, but because it’s not my right to tell you.”
Jamie considered this. “Are you his beard? Is he gay?”
“No,” I answered honestly.
“Then what is it?”
“Jamie—”
“You think you can trust this guy more than you can trust me?”
Was he serious? “You haven’t given me any reason to trust you. You have me on your Monte Cristo hit list. Asher has been like family to me these past three years.”
He sneered. “Asher Steadman is screwing with you, Jane. He told you he was helping you, right? That he would find something on his father that would help bring him down?”
“How did you know that?” How had he known I was going after Steadman in the first place?
“Am I right?”
I didn’t respond.
Jamie leaned toward me, his voice lowered to a deep growl. “You put all your trust in that bastard, but he’s never been helping you. He’s been deliberately sabotaging your attempts.”
Nausea rose inside me at the accusation, and I could feel the color draining from my face. No. No way. Jamie was just saying that to mess with my head. Asher was my friend. He was the one person in my life I could count on.
“I don’t believe you.”
“Fine. If you’re so sure, why don’t you ask him.”
Needing to get away from him, I threw open the passenger door and practically jumped out, slamming it shut as hard as I could. I didn’t waste another glance on Jamie as I hurried into the hangar.
I loved Asher.
He would never hurt me like Jamie had hurt me.
JAMIE
Watching Jane disappear into the studio, my fingers tightened around the steering wheel.
That morning, I’d woken up thinking about her. She was the first thing that popped into my head. I could even smell her on me.
Probably because I hadn’t showered, not wanting to wash her away just yet.
Jane was messing everything up.
My focus was shot to pieces.
It was like we were kids again, and all I could think about was her. From the moment I realized I wanted her, that’s how it had been between us. She was a constant thought in the back of my head, my every decision orbiting around her. And when she was in the room, I was aware of her every move.
I wanted to hate her.
Needed to.
Yet, I couldn’t stop remembering that moment of peace as I melted inside her.
Everything had been quiet and pain-free—perfect—for the first time in seven years.
Skye warned me that needing someone the way I needed Jane would only cause sorrow in the end.
She was right.
Because I wanted that feeling of peace back. I wanted another taste.
And I was afraid I might do anything for it.
Something stupid. Something that would ruin everything.
Something like forgiving her.
26
JANE
Headlights flared, passing me on the 101 as I drove to Asher’s Malibu beach house. Work had kept me at the studio late, so the highway wasn’t clogged with traffic, but it was still busy.
I wondered where the strangers who passed me were going, and if they were just as afraid of their destination as I was. I hoped not. My palms were sweaty around the steering wheel and I couldn’t get my heart to slow. I didn’t want to believe Jamie was right. It was easier to think he was just trying to wound