all the fanfare of an emptying balloon—which started its exit with a shrill wheeze and had a grand finale that sounded like a flatulence?
I frowned and looked up, only to find Josie standing over me, her hand poised for another karate chop. Valencia, our resident buttinsky, sat a few tables over with her fake-chinchilla-fur stole clutched near her ears. Nora leaned on Anderson, catching her breath.
“I’m fine,” I announced to the crowd, though mostly to Nora, who had to report to Sharon anytime a resident required “excessive” care. That was all I needed.
I raised my glass to her and took a sip to demonstrate my fineness. I smiled. I sipped some more.
Valencia released her stole and petted it back into place on her narrow shoulders. She’d penciled in her eyebrows as inverted Vs today, so even though she sounded fully recovered from the incident, she didn’t look it. “I say you should chew your food better next time, Duffy,” she said. “And you should thank that quick-thinking young lady for saving you.”
“It’s not a big deal,” Josie mumbled, slipping back into her seat. It was clear I’d scared the shit out of her. Her voice had a tremble in it. So did her fingers. For a moment, I felt moved to reach out and hold her hands to keep them from shaking. But she tucked them away in her lap when she caught me noticing, adding, “You can get me back later.”
It’s no wonder what she had in mind. I straightened my shirt collar and tried to reset. “What were we talking about?”
“Peepaw,” Anderson said.
I gave Carl my straightest face.
Nora patted my shoulder and turned to speak to Josie for the first time, but paused when she saw the black eye. “Girl . . .”
“I know, right? I caught the corner of a kitchen cabinet,” Josie said quickly, which sounded like pure bullshit to me, unless her cupboard had a great left hook.
Anderson said, “Welcome to my world. Once a week, at least. Let me see the damage.”
“No, that’s cool. You don’t—”
He crouched down and closed in. Josie held fast in her seat, trying to act casual. Looking everywhere but at him. As for Anderson, he studied her bruise for a hot second, but then his gaze grew imprecise too, and before either of them knew it, they were both looking at me as their safe point of focus.
I flipped them a friendly bird.
Anderson stood with a smirk, saying to Josie, “I’ll get you an ice pack.”
“Ice pack?” I said. “Whatever happened to a cold cut of beef?”
“They don’t do that anymore,” Anderson called as he sauntered off with our dirty dishes. “Meat carries E. coli.”
I leaned back in my chair. “Christ, how did we ever survive?”
Nora chuckled as she took her turn inspecting Josie’s injury, but the laugh turned into a cluck as she pivoted Josie’s face by the chin. “You got yourself good. I’ll bring you some over-the-counter for the swelling.”
“Thanks.”
“Mm-hmm.” Nora straightened up, moving her narrowed-eyed, tender gaze to the whole of Josie. Looked like she smelled trouble, but, same as me, she couldn’t decide if Josie was giving it or taking it. In the end, all she said was, “While you’re here visiting, make sure these boys treat you real nice.”
“That’s the plan,” Carl declared.
Nora gave him a satisfied nod and checked her watch. “Lord, this day is moving.” She looked at me, shaking that pointer finger again like earlier. “You behave now. Don’t be putting on any more shows.”
“I have a matinee in store,” I mumbled as she faded away to her drug cart for the midmorning pill distribution. The room slowly emptied behind her.
The moment we were alone, Carl blurted, “We’d love if you’d stay the week.”
My eyes went wide. “We barely agreed to one night.”
Carl put his hand up to silence me. “But you have to understand that we’re a little worried—”
“Try terrified,” I said.
“Concerned,” Carl amended, like this was an improvement, “because we’re not allowed