Beauty In Her Madness (Winterland Tale #3) - Stacey Marie Brown Page 0,59
While Scott and I danced around each other, acting as if everything was all right, we both knew nothing was. The gap between us that had never been there was widening. We never had our talk, since our work and school schedules seemed to be at constant odds, orbiting around each other.
The season was in high gear at work, and finals before winter break were looming, casting more stress down on us, picking at our nerves and moods like vultures. I struggled concentrating in class, turning more and more to my sketches, longing to start developing the scenes in a program, make them really come to life.
“Those are darker than normal.” Professor Cogsworth’s wide frame came up next to my seat, his stubby finger touching my scene.
“Professor.” I stupidly tried to cover up my bad artwork, hiding the fact once again I wasn’t paying attention to his class. “I was just—”
“Not doing your assignment.” A smile poked out between his split beard. “So unlike you, Dinah.”
I bit down on my lip, full of shame at disappointing one of my favorite teachers.
“I’m sorry.” I pulled my laptop closer to me. “Working on it now.”
He studied me for a moment.
“You know, Dinah, life isn’t a straight line. There are so many twists and turns, veering you off course. But not always are they detours. Sometimes life is trying to tell you something.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” A flush came up my neck to my cheeks, his statement stirring me in my seat.
“Sometimes it’s about risking everything for a dream no one else can see but you.”
My lungs clenched, blood burning deeper into my face, as if the man was peering into my soul, seeing everything I was trying to hide.
“I-I don’t understand.” My voice came out quiet and shaky.
He tipped his head, his expression serious and intent. “I think you do.”
My throat dried up, dampness lining my hairline.
“Let go of what you think should be, and you will find the world is full of wonder and possibilities. Don’t let your own mind cage you. You are meant for more, Dinah. So much more than this provincial life.” He shook his head, a huge smile pillowing his cheeks, his happy demeanor returning. “Now get back to work, or I might have to tattle on you to your father when we have coffee tomorrow.” He patted my arm, strolling away, leaving me shaken and unnerved.
My head turned back to my laptop, numbers and letters strung out in endless lines and blocks. Just a moment ago, they all made perfect sense, black and white. Now I stared at them like they were foreign, the figures blurring together into a solid background. Chunks of the coding came together, my eyes locked on the words forming on the screen, reminding me of those pictures if you stared at long enough, you could see a design.
IT’S TIME, DINAH popped from the screen, freezing my chest.
I blinked, and the writing was gone. I just saw my half-written code waiting for me to finish.
A chill ran up my spine, and I slammed my laptop shut, jumping up from my chair, shoving my stuff in my bag, my heart thumping in my chest.
“Dinah? Class isn’t over.” I heard Professor Cogsworth call for me as I beelined out of the room, my lungs feeling as if they had a rope around them, strangling out the air.
Stepping out into the night, the freezing winter air smacked me in the face, punching down my throat. The painful draw of breath helped steady my feet.
While my lungs loosened, taking in air, my skin prickled…and not from the cold. Like someone blew on the back of my neck, alarm shivered through me, darting my gaze around the grounds. I knew I was being watched. Like thousands of needles poking into my skin, I could sense eyes on me. Hunting. Waiting.
Only a few figures here and there moved across campus, the light from the lampposts casting an eerie glow down on the frosted pathways, shadows deep where the light did not reach. I had always been cautious. As a woman in this world, you had to be. I carried pepper spray with me, but it wasn’t the human monsters I was afraid of.
It was the ones in my mind.
Swallowing, I headed for the parking lot, my feet treading quickly down the path. My skin crawled as if tiny ants covered it. I pushed my feet into a run, anxiety pumping my pulse in my ears.