for Egypt. I hate to admit it, but I’m going to be kind of sad to see all this end. I mean, it’s a great party here at the Discard Pile.
I kind of got the best of both worlds—I made it halfway through the competition before I got kicked off. So I haven’t been here since the start, not long enough to get totally sick of it, anyway. I got to show my stuff. I was in it long enough for people to get to know me. I have fans. Can’t say that about Joe Twitch, can you?
Some people think that the show’s prejudiced against jokers. That they only want pretty people, and jokers, let’s face it, just aren’t pretty.
But hey, you know what I say to that? Being a joker’s what you make of it. I mean, Peregrine’s a joker. Hasn’t held her back at all. DB and Joker Plague have made a cottage industry of being jokers. Me—I wouldn’t want to be any other way, you know? People are always going to know me because of this. [holds up tail]
In fact, and I probably shouldn’t be talking about this until it’s a done deal, but there’s this game show in Japan. One of those crazy stunt things with people jumping through hoops and landing in mud while working math problems, or chicks in bikinis on mechanical bulls throwing cream pies at each other. That kind of thing. And they need a host. And they want me. Can you believe it?
It just goes to show you, everybody’s got a niche. Everybody’s got a place in the world. You just have to put yourself out there and find it.
I love American Hero. I love the Discard Pile. And I love you, man. [points to the camera and winks] How about that for Mr. Japanese Game Show?
Week 12: How the Cards Fall
Week Twelve Recap: The American Hero
American Hero began on a somber note this week. Events on the other side of the world have brought home just how urgently selfless heroism is needed in the world—and what cost such heroism sometimes exacts. We recognize some of our former contestants who have made the ultimate sacrifice during the recent conflict in Egypt. Simoon, King Cobalt, and Hardhat will never be forgotten by fans of this show. Let us all remember with pride the good that they accomplished in their all-too-short lives.
Back in Hollywood, the excitement was almost too much to take as Rosa Loteria and Stuntman faced their final challenge. Both aces were picked up early and escorted to Carpenter Avenue School, where they appeared before a cheering crowd of schoolchildren. One of the jobs of a hero is to be a role model to children like this, and Rosa and Jamal got a taste of what that’s like. They also had their stamina tested as they signed autographs for hundreds of kids!
Stuntman told the audience of eager children what he thinks it means to be a hero: “What we’ve all shown is that it doesn’t matter where you came from or what you can do. It’s about how hard you try. It’s about taking risks to do what’s right. That makes you a hero.” Rosa had her own take: “You have to stand up for yourself, and you have to stand up for people who can’t stand up for themselves. You have to protect other people, look out for your friends and family. If you got the power to do that, then that’s what you got to do.”
The aces’ next stop was the Los Angeles Police Department training academy, where they went through the obstacle course and hand-to-hand combat training with the rest of the rookies. What would it be like for our heroes to work with law enforcement? That was what Stuntman and Rosa demonstrated here, and both of them showed the talent and courage that got them through eleven weeks of competition to this point, leaping to each new challenge without batting an eye. Rosa’s luck was with her as she seemed to draw just the right card for each situation, from leading a squad of rookies to soundly defeating the academy’s martial arts instructor. Stuntman endured cringe-inducing blows that would have destroyed any but the strongest aces in the world. He has more than proven himself worthy of joining their ranks.
The last obstacle on this final day of challenges might have been called “Grace Under Pressure.” Because all that was left for them to face were the judges,