I know I should tell him no. I know that even right now, I’m breaking all the rules. I could lose my job… I could lose my license. I blame it on the jealous inferno that was burning inside me when I saw him with April before I knew who she was. I know I should tell him no. I know it… but I can’t.
I nod my head.
I know even though he can’t see me, he can feel my nod since his hot muscular hands are holding my neck.
“No, honey. I need to hear the words. I need you to tell me yes.”
Is this my life? I think. I take a deep breath and know that what I’m about to say could change everything. I breathe it out, low and unsteady. “Yes.”
I stand on my tiptoes and he lowers down. I cup his face, meeting him lip to lip.
It’s a soft caress but his firm lips against mine makes me press up to get closer to him. He angles my face, gaining better access, and when his tongue caresses the seam of my lips, I open to him.
He’s holding on to me, gripping my neck almost painfully, but I don’t cry out because I don’t want him to stop. I slide my hands down his face, down his chest and grip the front of his shirt in my hands. I clench on to him, pulling him against me until I’m standing between his legs and he’s holding my lower body against him. I can’t help but feel his manhood pressed into my belly. His lips caress me one more time and when he finally pulls away, he leaves me breathless. His forehead rests on mine and I can feel his muscles under his shirt ripple with every breath in and out.
When I finally come to my senses, I start to pull away. My hand is touching my lip. “We shouldn’t have done that. I shouldn’t be kissing you.”
He takes a step forward, but he walks into my raised hand pressing against his chest. “No, Mack. That was completely unprofessional, and I shouldn’t be, well, taking advantage of you or the situation.”
He laughs then. It’s deep and hearty, a big rumble from his chest. “Taking advantage of me? There’s no way you’ve taken advantage of me.”
His hands go to my hips and I have to fight really hard to keep up my restraint. I would give anything to give in to this feeling, but I can’t. I know I can’t.
I take a step back. “I’m sorry, Mack. I can’t.”
I walk away then, muttering to him that I’ll be back and going into the other room. I know I’ve disappointed him. Hell, I’ve disappointed myself.
The rest of the day is quiet and awkward. When Josh gets here, I tell them both bye and rush out the door. I know Mack probably thinks I’m heartless but I’m not. No, it’s killing me, because I would do anything to have a man like Mack. Even before I met him, I had heard of him. Him and all the other firemen at ladder forty-nine. He has saved countless numbers of people but one that stands out the most to me is the handicapped boy that almost died in a fire last year. Mack went in when he shouldn’t have. He came out with burns to his arms, but he saved that little boy. He not only is a hero, but he’s an all-around nice guy. Getting to know him yesterday and today, well, it just makes me like him even more. The way he was with April, the way he’s grieved his friend, the way he’s handled everything that’s being thrown at him. Well, he’s a man like none I’ve ever met.
When I get to my car, I take a deep breath and try to calm myself before pulling away… knowing that I’ll be spending the rest of the night thinking of him and what could have been.
Mack
Fuck. She left and there’s nothing I can do about it. I know she’s worried about her job, but I think what we could have is bigger than that. One kiss and I know she’s the one. I know it’s crazy. We don’t know anything about each other. Hell, I don’t even know what she looks like except for what Josh and April told me.
It’s a good thing that I don’t give up. No. When there’s something I want, I go after it. I’ve done it all my