"Like the hat," Nina said as she followed Julia inside. "Hi there," Lance said, and held out his hand. "I'm Lance "Welcome, Lance," Steve said, shaking his hand. "Come on in."
In the grand foyer, their footsteps echoed on the marble floor, despite the gorgeous rugs and wall hangings that Nina had sold to Caroline at cost, earning her a place in Steve': penny-pinching heart forever. A staircase curved to the second story and the formal living room stretched out beneath a cathedral ceiling, and Julia had to wonder for the millionth time( how her sister and brother-in-law had wound up here. It look like a page from a magazine, and it had been Julia's experience! that only two-dimensional people live in such two-dimensional rooms. But the chandelier kept blazing, and all six thousand square feet of it kept gathering dust—despite Caroline's constant efforts otherwise.
Steve led the way through a formal dining room that Julia had never seen anyone use. They were about to enter the kitchen when her sister screamed, "I'm going to kill her!"
"Now, Caroline, sweetheart, you shouldn't harbor darkness in your heart."
Great, Mom's beret, Julia thought. But Caroline was havin: none of their mother's goodness and wisdom.
"Mom, you misunderstood. I didn't say I hated her, I said I was going to kill her."
Steve, Julia, Nina, and Lance exchanged glances as Caroline shrieked, "That old bat is trying to ruin my daughter's party!"
Nina leaned close to Julia and whispered, "Ro-Ro?"
"I don't think so," Julia whispered back. A loud crash echoed through the house, and Steve bolted toward the noise, muttering, "That sounded expensive!" The rest of them hurried along behind him.
"That is our backyard!" Caroline was saying as they all entered the kitchen. "Three different surveyors were here, and they all agreed on the property line. So help me, if she pulls up one more stake, I'm going to stick it up her ..."
Caroline stopped short at the newcomers' arrival. Then everyone seemed to stare at Lance, who looked wrinkled and worn. Julia knew how exhausted she was, and thought that he must be about to collapse, too; he certainly looked like it.
"Julia, welcome back," her mother said at last. "Aren't you going to introduce your friend?"
Friend. Not sweetheart or parasite or stalker. Friend. She could handle that.
"Lance Collins, this is my mother, Madelyn, and my sister, Caroline. You met Steve and Nina. Everyone, you probably know about Lance."
The grins on the women's faces said that yes, they knew all about Lance. Steve's vacant expression said that he was wondering what would happen to the 248b deduction when Congress met next session. For the first time ever, Julia wished the rest of her family was more like Steve.
"Sweetheart," Steve said to Caroline. "Did I hear something break?"
"Oh, Steve, I'm fine," Caroline told him.
"But what broke?" he persisted.
"It was a pickle jar, Steve," Madelyn said, obviously understanding what her son-in-law was getting at. "And don't worry, it was empty. No precious pickles went to waste."
Steve seemed to visibly relax.
"Lance, won't you come over here and sit down?" Madelyn gestured to one of the barstools surrounding Caroline's granite-covered island. "You must be exhausted. Did you have a nice trip?"
"He had a fine trip, Mother," Julia said, but Madelyn cut her a look that mothers never lose, no matter how many years removed from the womb their children are.
"I was talking to Lance, Julia Marie. I was speaking to your guest."
"Hey, don't jump on me. Caroline's the one premeditating murder," Julia said, quietly relieved that there was a major crisis on the table, something—anything—to take the focus off her and the stray that she'd brought home.
Caroline sighed and screamed into a dishrag. "When she came up for air, she explained: "Crazy Myrtle is about to be the death of me."
"Caroline," Madelyn interceded, "don't you think you're being a little harsh?"
"She goes through our trash," Caroline said with the finality of someone laying down a trump card.
"No way does she actually do that." Nina laughed.
"Oh yes she does," Caroline said defiantly. "She goes out there in her bathrobe before the garbage men come. She'll dig around, and if she finds something she likes, she'll take it." Before anyone could protest this bold revelation, Caroline raised her right hand and said, "I swear."
"Well, what do you do about it?" Nina asked.