stroke. Sabra and Liam are getting a divorce too. He cheated on her with his secretary. My whole family appears to be falling apart, except for the two religious fanatics, who seem divinely happy. My sister, the nun, and my brother, the rabbi. The rest of us are a mess.” He looked depressed when he said it and she smiled.
“Holy shit. What happened?”
“Sabra and Liam don’t get along, and he’s cheated on her before. They fight all the time. They’re a nightmare to be around. And Tamar has had some kind of epiphany, which doesn’t include me. We tried counseling, which I didn’t want to tell you. It just got worse.” He didn’t look heartbroken over it; he looked shocked. And Coco was even more so.
“Do you think she has someone else?” It seemed so unlike her. But he was busy, working to support a family of six.
“She’s been going to a different synagogue. I suppose she could be in love with the rabbi, or someone there. She doesn’t think I’m religious enough for her. And I’m not. I wanted to go to a Reform temple, not the strict Orthodox synagogues she prefers. This is going to kill my mother,” he said mournfully. He viewed his mother as fragile, which she was not.
“Your mother is a strong woman, she’ll be fine.” She had no doubt of that. “What about you? How are you?”
“I’m shocked. I never thought she’d do this. I know she’s been unhappy and depressed since the baby. But not to this extent. She told me a week ago she wants out. I wanted to tell you when I saw you.”
“Can you work out some kind of decent arrangement for the kids?” Coco asked him. They were still so young.
“We’re trying. I think the last baby put her over the edge. It almost did me in too. He’s colicky, he cries all the time. I suggested a nanny, not a divorce. She wants both.” He looked hurt and she felt sorry for him. “If you want to make it work, you can. She doesn’t want to. She just wants out. It will be complicated with four kids and her in law school, and I’m busy.”
“Just like that? With four kids? No warning? No negotiation?”
“Not that I know of. She says she warned me, but she didn’t. Or I didn’t hear it. I feel like such a failure.” He had tears in his eyes.
“It’s not you, Sam. She’s been a mouse since you met her. And now she turns into a lion.” Tamar was twenty-eight, and coming into her own. She suddenly wanted independence and freedom, and everything she’d missed.
“She wants me to have custody, and she’ll have visitation. So she’s walking out on the kids too.” Coco was floored and would never have seen it coming. Not Tamar. “The irony is that I felt like I was drowning for a long time. We started having babies so quickly, which was what she wanted, and our families expected of us. She’s so adamant about anything religious, and she’s never been interested in the world or the community until now. I almost had an affair two years ago, with a girl who worked for me. I fired her so I didn’t do anything stupid. And now Tamar wants out. I’m not happy either, but I’m not walking out on her, or complaining about her religious convictions. I don’t blame her that we got married. I got pushed into it by my parents, but I’ve lived up to my side of the deal. We have nothing in common, and nothing to talk about. I love my kids, but I’m always running between them and my work, and trying to keep her happy. She complains all the time. And my mother expects me to keep my father’s business alive to honor him. What he created is antiquated and should be shut down. It made sense when he set it up, but now it doesn’t. It supported all of us, but it was a different time and he was a different man. He thought small. He was always afraid to do anything big. I’m much more interested in the investment side of the business, not the accounting, which was our bread and butter, but it’s stale now. There’s no magic or creativity to it.” He was trapped between the world he grew up in, and what he wanted to do himself, grow wings and fly. And Tamar and his mother were