I feel the same? Why can't I just go along with Father's plans to end up with Nicoletta? It would make everything so much fucking easier.
Dinner is a ridiculously formal affair with nine courses. By the end of the meal, I'm sick and tired of Gustavo's incessant chatter and eager to return to my bedroom, but he tells me I'll have ten minutes alone with Nicoletta afterward, so I must wait.
I know exactly what those ten minutes are for. I'm supposed to propose to a woman that means nothing to me. I don't know if I can go through with it, but I also know if I don't, there will be hell to pay both from Gustavo and my father. So, I swallow my pride and say goodbye to a sullen-looking Ryder and elated Carlucci who leave me alone with the stunning mafia princess.
The moment they're gone, she turns toward me with an expectant expression.
I'm dreading this, but I don't have a fucking choice. "I know this has been sudden," I tell her. "I know you're probably scared and—"
"I'm not scared," she quickly interrupts. "I'm excited. So excited. I've been waiting my whole life to meet my husband. And from the moment I walked in here, I knew it was you."
"You mean apart from the beginning when you thought I was my brother." I smirk at her, making her blush. Before she can speak up, I continue, "Don't worry, I'm just teasing you. You look pretty blushing like that."
She blushes harder. "Thank you..."
"But it's very, very soon," I tell her next. "We've known each other for an hour. And I just don't know if it's fair to either one of us to propose right now."
Her face falls. She looks offended. "Don't you like me? Am I not pretty enough? Is there somebody else?"
I need to do damage control, right the fuck now. "Nicoletta..." I want to reach for her hand, but then I remember her father's words and change my mind. "I don't want to hurt you. I want to do right by you and be the man you deserve. Look, let me show you something." I pull out the golden chain with the wedding band that Marzia gave me. Nicoletta reaches for it, but I subtly move my hand back. Still, the motion doesn't escape her.
She pouts.
"This is from a couple that loved each other dearly," I speak up. "So dearly that the love is still remembered and celebrated today. You see, this is what I want from marriage. A lifelong commitment and a promise to stay together no matter what happens."
"I can give you that," she says quickly. Too quickly. "I can give you everything."
"I know you can, but you aren't ready," I insist. "You're seventeen. Let's at least wait until your birthday."
"But I—"
"We can make a deal." I smile reassuringly. "You can tell people we're engaged. That I proposed. We'll just keep this our little secret. And it will be something to look forward to in a few months when your birthday comes around. Would you like that?"
"I suppose," she mutters.
"I know you expected more," I say. "But I need to be fair to both of us. You're just a kid."
"I'm not a kid."
"Nicoletta." I grin. "You're seventeen. Not just a kid. Jail bait."
She smiles at that, finally nodding as I finish speaking.
I'm grateful for this since our time together is running out and Gustavo will surely come barging in here any second to escort me out. "So what do you say?" I ask. "Can you keep our little secret?"
"Of course." She smiles. "As long as I can lie to everyone."
"What a little minx." I laugh out loud. "Tell whoever you want."
"Perfect." Her eyes glitter with mischief just as there's a knock on the door. "Come in!"
Gustavo enters along with my brother.
Nicoletta shrieks, throwing her arms around her father's shoulders. "We're engaged, we're engaged!"
Well, she sure as hell took advantage of me letting her lie to everyone.
Something tells me little Nicoletta Carlucci isn't quite as innocent as her father wants her to be.
12
Marzia
Adrian is set to return today. I've been fooling myself, thinking I don't want him here, but I do. I've felt lonely and abandoned since he's been gone, unnoticed by everyone around me, as if I'm invisible.
The only human contact I have is Eleanora, and I'm immeasurably grateful for my maid who provides a welcome reprieve from the quiet corners of my mind. Even though she doesn't speak, her mere presence is a comfort.
I haven't