His warm hand squeezed the foot closest to him as he moved to sit down beside me. Neither of us spoke as we stared out over the still water. I’d never been so nervous in my life.
Beau shifted beside me and then laid back on the pillows behind us. I turned slightly to peer down at him. Did he want me to lay down too? Tucking one arm behind his head and stretching the other out beside him Beau grinned up at me as if he could read my mind.
“Come here,” he said.
I quickly scooted over and curled up beside him, resting my head on his chest. There was a peace in his arms I’d never experienced with Sawyer. It was as if I’d come home after years of searching.
“I love Sawyer, Ash,” Beau said quietly into the night. He sounded as if he was trying to convince me of this. “My whole life I’ve never envied him anything. Not his father. Not his mother. Not his money. Not his athletic abilities.” He stopped and took a ragged breath. My heart ached for him. I squeezed the hand resting on his stomach into a fist to keep from reaching up and soothing him like a child. “Until the day I watched from across the football field as he picked you up and kissed you on the mouth. It wasn’t your first kiss. I might have just been fourteen years old but I could tell I’d somehow been left out of a secret. I wanted to plant my fist in his face and rip you out of his arms. As I took a step toward him your eyes met mine and I saw the silent pleading for forgiveness or acceptance. I wasn’t sure which. All I knew was you were Sawyer’s now. My best friend was gone. I envied him and hated him for the first time that day. He’d finally won the one prize I thought was mine.”
I closed my eyes against the tears threatening to spill down my cheeks. I wanted to tell him how I’d never felt faint when Sawyer kissed me or how the earth didn’t move under his touch. Instead I stayed silent, knowing I couldn’t. Even though it was Beau I wanted, I knew I could never have him. These last two weeks were all we had. Sawyer would come home and I would be with him again. There was no other option.
I turned over and leaned up on my elbow until I was staring down into his somber eyes. I could feel his heart beating fast underneath my hand.
“You were my best friend, Beau. You never treated me or looked at me any way but as a friend. Once I started to change and we all began to notice the opposite sex you never seemed to care that I was a girl. Sawyer did. Maybe because he hadn’t been my partner in crime. Maybe because the connection I had with him hadn’t been the same as the one I had with you. But he saw me as a girl. I think deep down I’d been waiting on you but when he kissed me, I knew it would never be you. I wasn’t the one for you.”
Beau reached up and cupped the side of my face with his hand.
“I was very aware that you were a girl, Ash. I was just scared because the one person in the world who knew every secret I’d ever had also happened to be the most beautiful girl I’d ever known. My feelings for you were scary as hell.”
I leaned down and kissed the frown between his brows.
“Right now. Right here. I’m yours. Not Sawyer’s. He isn’t who I want. Right now, all I want is you.” I chose my words carefully so we both understood my meaning.
He took my waist and shifted his body so I was completely on top of him. I lowered my mouth to his and sighed as his hands found the hem of my dress and the warm pressure of his palms ran up my thighs.
Tonight I would give myself to Beau because I wanted to. He was the town’s bad boy and I was the preacher’s daughter. It wasn’t supposed to happen this way.
“Ash, I want you. Bad, very, very bad. But you deserve better than this.”
I bent back down over him and kissed him again before pulling back enough to whisper, “It doesn’t get any better than this, Beau.”
His hands cupped my bottom and shifted me so I could feel the pressure of his obvious arousal against the warmth between my thighs.
“Please, Beau,” I cried out, not sure what I was begging for but knowing I needed more. His hands gripped my waist.
“Hold onto me, baby. I’m going to take care of you.” The raspy need in his voice only made me more desperate.
His hips rocked against mine one more time, causing waves of pleasure to pulse through my body from the friction between my legs. Beau reached up and cupped his hand behind my head and pulled me down until my mouth covered his. This was what I needed. This connection. A raw, needy, honest attraction. Not something controlled and careful. I needed reckless.
Beau’s tongue slid between my lips and began to taste every dark corner of my mouth like I was some exotic treat he wanted to savor. This was the feeling I’d always longed for. In one swift move Beau rolled me over and hovered over me before pressing a trail of kisses across my chest. I needed more. Wiggling I reached for his hair and tugged on the short strands impatiently. A low chuckle rumbled against Beau’s chest before a warm hand slid between my legs and slowly made its way up my thigh.
I couldn’t keep an anxious sigh from escaping my mouth.
“You’re beautiful, Ash,” Beau whispered as his hand reached its destination. One long finger traced the outside edge of my panties and I whimpered, wanting more. “I love it when you make those sweet little noises. Drives me crazy,” he murmured against my neck.
When Beau’s warmth left me I started to protest until both his hands slipped under my sundress and his fingers slid into the sides of my panties and began pulling them down. I watched his face as I gasped for air. The excitement and need was making it hard to take deep breaths. There was a look of wonder and almost worshipful gaze in Beau’s eyes as he pulled my panties off then folded them and placed them beside him. Finally he lifted his eyes to meet mine.
“Are you sure?” The restraint in his voice was obvious. He would stop if I wanted him to. I trusted him. Completely.
“Yes. Very sure,” I replied, pulling one leg up so that my sundress slipped down my leg and bunched at my waist.
Beau’s eyes went wide with excitement. Slowly he reached his hand out to touch my knee before moving the rough tips of his fingers down my thigh. His chest was rising and falling with each quick, short breath he took, until his finger slid over my warmth.
“Ash,” his voice constricted.
“Please, Beau,” I begged, needing him to move his fingers. Once he slipped one then two inside me I lost all thought and cried out. I didn’t know what I was saying but I knew I was begging him. I didn’t want this to ever end. He began pumping his fingers in and out as his free hand pushed my other leg back, opening me up completely to his view. The naughtiness of what we were doing sent me over the edge and just like earlier today my world shattered into a million colorful intense wonderful tremors.
Beau