Chapter Seventeen
I was home an hour before momma said I should be. After our business dinner we drove back to my house and he walked me to the door then gave me his number, took mine and said he’d be in touch by Monday with my travel arrangements.
There was obviously no kiss and the whole flirty-interested vibe I’d gotten from him in our past meetings was completely gone. Now he was very professional and businesslike.
When I walked in the door I heard momma in the kitchen. She was normally in bed this time of the night. With my being out she wasn’t going to sleep. After I told her about my new job I wondered if she would sleep at all. Actually, I wasn’t sure how she was going to feel about this. Would she be happy that I was finding a way to see the world or upset about my leaving home, alone to New York City? Either way I was going. I just didn’t want to upset her. I wanted her to be happy for me.
“He didn’t ask me out because he’s interested in me the way you think.”
She folded the towel in her hands, placed it by the sink and then looked up at me. “Is that so?”
I nodded. “He wants to hire me as a housekeeper at his penthouse in Manhattan. He has several places all over the world and the lady he had working in this one retired. The pay is one thousand a week plus room, board, and health insurance.”
There, I said it all.
Momma pulled out a chair from around the table and sank down with a weary sigh. “You’re gonna go aren’t you.”
It wasn’t a question. It was just acceptance. Minus any excitement.
“It’s my way out, momma. My chance to live another life. I can save money and then maybe go to college or with this reference get another job when it’s time. This is the means to that end. Without a man attached.”
She shook her head. “That’s where you’re wrong. There is a man attached.”
“Yes, but he’s my boss. He took me to a diner momma. Nothing fancy. He talked business and explained that when he was in town he would entertain guests and I was to keep it clean and the food stocked. That was it. He also said he only came a few days a month.”
“Is he married?” she asked me.
I shook my head. “No.” Honestly, I wasn’t sure. He didn’t wear a ring, but did that mean anything?
“Does he have a girlfriend? Fiancé?”
“Possibly, probably, I don’t know. We just talked about my job and that’s it. He doesn’t share his personal stuff with me.”
Momma rubbed her hand over her face and for a moment we sat there, neither of us speaking. The reality that I was taking this job and leaving was settling in for us both.
“Reckon you’re grown and I can’t tell you any different. You want out of this place and this is a ticket out. But remember these words: ain’t no man hires a girl with your looks to just clean his house and cook. He’ll want more. Maybe not now, but he will. And you’ll have to make that decision. Just know that this here is home and when you need to run back the door is always open.”
This was home. The girls, even though they could drive me nuts, were a part of me forever. And Henry was my heart. I would miss them all. Especially momma. But living with security, and always sense, wasn’t the way to chase your dreams. Dreams were scary. This was supposed to be scary.
“I know momma.”
She nodded her head, released a sigh and stood on weary legs. “Since you were a little girl I knew you’d be the one to leave me. That face has stopped traffic and brought attention all your life. You don’t see it or feel it, but Mr. Hale does. Don’t forget that. He’s a man and you’re beautiful. Inside and out. Don’t let that ever change Sammy Jo.”
I stood to close the distance between us. Tears stung my eyes and momma wrapped me in her arms. “I love you,” I told her, as the first tear rolled down my cheek.
“And I love you.”
We stood like that for a long time. My future playing out in our heads, imagining what it would be like in New York City really soon. How my life would change and I would adjust. I knew momma was full of concerns and fears. I’d call her weekly and keep her updated. After a while she wouldn’t worry. She’d see I was able to handle it, was going to be okay.
She believed Hale was attracted to my beauty. Momma didn’t realize there were beautiful women with class and money all around him. He could date models and heiresses. I wasn’t the prettiest girl in the world. Though convincing my momma of that was impossible. So I let it go. I knew this was a business agreement. My attraction to Hale would fade with time or at least I hoped it would. I didn’t need to be attracted to my boss. That would lead to heartache. In Manhattan I wouldn’t stand out like I apparently did in Moulton. There would be beauty and wealth all around me. I would be nothing else but me. I looked forward to that.
But I was going to miss this house. My momma, sisters, brother, Jamie, Ben and even the bakery, were all a part of me. The largest slice of what I was and in the future would become. This place had built me from the ground up and now I’d leave it behind. Instead of dancing around in joy I felt sad and anxious in leaving. Because I knew I would miss it all. Staying here was out of the question. I wanted more and had to go get it.
Knowing I could always come home again was what eased my ache and gave me the courage to do this from the start. I wasn’t running away. I was only going forward. To a life that was worth writing about and maybe I’d do that too. Write about this. Document my journey. Share it one day with my kids. I’d make a mark on this world and in return, this world would mark me too. I’d clutch on with both hands and enjoy the ride and see what happened in time. Daddy always said it wasn’t the destination, but the journey, that’s what mattered. My journey was about to begin. Or had it begun already?
Chapter Eighteen
When I first told my sisters they were all giddy with excitement and hopes for a visit. Once packing began things changed. It was Bessy who cracked first. She walked into the bedroom where I was putting my clothes into the only suitcase we owned. Momma had been given the suitcase as a wedding gift from her mother. We haven’t had a reason to use it since my mother was married. Seeing it packed was too much on Bessy and her tears weren’t quiet ones. Within seconds she was sobbing loudly, in a heap on the floor in hysterics. I stopped and went to sit beside Bessy, pulling her into my arms.