“Goodbye, Pagan Moore,” I whispered into the darkness.
Chapter Nineteen
Pagan
Sleeping on it didn’t make accepting it any easier. It seemed like a really bad dream. I rolled over to see Miranda’s empty bed. Another night with Nathan. I had two female friends here. One was in heat and always gone. The other wasn’t human. I was truly alone. I reached for my phone and scrolled down my contacts until I found my mother’s number. I needed to hear her voice. This must be what homesick felt like.
“Pagan? Hey, Honey, are you okay?”
“I’m okay,” I assured her. I wasn’t one to call home much. The one time we had talked last week had been when she’d called me to see how I was settling in.
“It’s seven in the morning. I didn’t realize you were capable of being awake at seven in the morning.”
“Ha. Ha. I have three eight a.m. classes a week, thank you very much.”
“Oh, well that explains it. This is a new phenomenon. I had to beat you with your bacon in the mornings to get you up before seven thirty.”
“I’m a big girl now,” I replied feeling a lump form in my throat. Talking to mom wasn’t making this better. I wanted to go curl up on the couch with her and watch CSI reruns.
“You sure? Because something sounds wrong.”
“I miss you,” I managed to choke out without crying.
“Oh, baby. I miss you too! Are you homesick? I could come visit. Do you want me to come visit?”
No. I didn’t want her to come visit because I may not let her leave me. “No. I’m fine. I just wanted to hear your voice this morning and tell you that I miss your pancakes. A caramel latte just isn’t the same thing.”
Mom chuckled into the phone. “Well as soon as you get home for Thanksgiving break I will have pancakes waiting for you.”
“Thanks. I can look forward to those. I need to go now. I’ve got to get dressed.”
“Alright. Don’t be late for class. Call me anytime you want to. You’re a beautiful, smart girl and you’ll find your place there real soon.”
“Okay, I’ll talk to you soon. Love you.”
“Love you, Honey. Bye.”
“Bye.”
I dropped the phone onto the bed and stood up to go get a shower. My eyes landed on the silver Celtic knot that had once hung around Dank’s neck. It was lying on top of my notebook. I started to reach for it and stopped. I wasn’t sure how it got here and why it was here. I’d told him to leave me alone. I didn’t like thinking he could be in my room while I was sleeping. I hurried to the bathroom. Getting out of this room and in the real world where people had bodies and weren’t immortal was my ultimate goal.
When I opened the front door of the dorm to head to class I stopped when Jay shoved off from the railing he had been leaning on. He had a coffee in his hands. I knew Jay didn’t drink coffee.
“Good morning,” he said smiling and holding the coffee out toward me. “Caramel latte with whipped cream.”
“Thank you,” I replied taking the cup from him. “What did I do to deserve morning coffee service?”
Jay shrugged, “It gave me a reason to see you. Miranda told me what time you left this morning and I thought I’d see if I could score some bonus points. The fact I get to start my day with you was a pretty big draw.”
Smiling I took a sip of the coffee then sighed my approval. “Well, thank you. That’s really sweet.”
“I had one more ulterior motive,” he said and rubbed his hands together. That was his nervous gesture. I knew it well.
“Okay, but can we discuss it on my way to class, so I’m not late?” I asked stepping up beside him.
“Yeah, yeah, of course.” We walked down the stairs and headed for the sidewalk that led to the front of the English building.