“Yes. That’s good. Do you remember any of the other words?”
She closed her eyes and shook her head, “I’m trying.” Then her eyes flew open, “Don’t stay and ruin all my plans. You can’t have my soul. I’m not a man. The empty vessel I dwell in is not meant to feel the heat you bring. So I push you away and I push you away… Yet you stay.”
“Does any of that make sense to you?” I still held onto the hope that she would remember something.
“No. It’s very sad and dark. None of it makes sense.”
Sighing, I ran my hand through my hair. How was I supposed to explain this to her? “Do you know what a soul is Pagan? I mean really understand what a soul is?”
She scrunched up her nose. “Yeah, it’s what is inside. It’s who you are.”
I nodded, “And a body is the house for the soul. Once the body dies the soul is given another life.”
“So you are one of those reincarnation believers?”
No, I wasn’t a believer. I knew the facts. I shook my head, “No. I don’t believe anything. I know. Your soul is who you are. In this body and in the next it is you. It will always be you. I don’t get to have a soul, Pagan. This isn’t a body. Not like yours. It is me. I can appear to humans and I can walk beside them invisible. I choose who will see me.”
“You’re like a… ghost? Because I’m not believing that. I touched you, I know you’re very real.”
Grinning for the first time since I’d started this conversation I shook my head. “No, I’m not a ghost. I’m who comes to take the soul from the body. It is my job to take the soul from the body that can no longer house it. I send the soul on so that it can be given another body.”
Pagan stood there studying me carefully. I could see her mind processing what I’d just told her. Calling myself something she’d said she hated wasn’t what I wanted to do. I didn’t want her to immediately hate me because of my title.
“I don’t understand. What does that?”
“Oh, for crying the f**k out loud. I got to do this last time and I’m going to do it this time. It just sounds better coming from me,” Gee announced as she walked out from behind a tree.
Pagan spun around to look at her. “Gee?”
“Yeah, Peggy Ann it’s me. Who else would be listening in on this crazy assed shit?”
“Gee, let me do this,” I said not wanting her here for this.
“You can’t do this, Dankmar. You should have kept your mouth shut. But you couldn’t. Now you’ve started this and you gotta finish it,” Gee turned her focus to Pagan.
“We’ve already done this song and dance once but I will tell you it was a helluva lot more fun then. The drama was high and Dank’s existence was on the line. This time we don’t have to worry about people dying and shit.”
“Gee, leave,” I demanded. But Gee was one of the few beings who didn’t fear me.
“Sure thing. But first let me clear this up. Pagan, Dank’s actual title in the great big grand scheme of things is Death. When it’s your time to go, this is the guy who shows up.”
Pagan took a step back from me then another. She shifted her frightened gaze from me to Gee . I waited for her to argue or call Gee a liar. She didn’t do either of those things.
“Say something, Pagan,” I begged.
“Stay away from me.” she demanded then spun around and ran.
Pagan
I was afraid to sleep. Miranda was gone. Gee was… Gee was an old friend of Dank’s. I jumped up and ran over to the bathroom door and locked it on my side. I went and locked my room door too. It wasn’t that I didn’t believe them. Dank had talked in my head, controlled my sleep, and appeared out of nowhere. He was something. Accepting that he was Death was easier than thinking he was something like a ghost or wizard or god forbid—a vampire. Those were mythical creatures. They weren’t real. But Death, Death was real.
Could Death be more than just the time a body dies? The soul has to let go. Is death called what it is because of the one who takes the soul? It made sense. I believed him. And I was equally terrified of him. It wasn’t healthy for a human to have a relationship with Death. He was the end-all. I wasn’t ready to die. I didn’t want to see him again until it was my time to go. I hoped that wouldn’t be until I was very old and wrinkly.
A knock on the bathroom door startled me and I grabbed the nearest tool I could find. A pencil sharpener. Not very threatening.
“Open the door, Peggy Ann or I’m coming in. It’s real easy for me.”
Was she Death too? Were there more of them? Did they all sing in rock bands or dress emo?