Zenith in Love (Zenith Series #5) - Leanne Davis Page 0,26

That’s how they ended up here, like this.

“I don’t know.”

“But you’re not saying it’s not a problem though?”

“No.”

Shame filled him. Of course, it was wrong and also a problem if he were so desperate to hide it.

“You’re no virgin either.”

He leaned back and rose to his feet, keeping his back to her. “No.”

“Did you cheat on Kathy?”

“Never.”

She became silent and he heard her rustling around as she got up.

“I don’t want to talk about it. I was drunk. You were here. I’m sorry.”

Cold. Rude. Honest. And truthful.

He ran his hand along his neck and looked away while massaging the muscles there. “I just… I need to sleep. Could we possibly shelve this conversation until later?”

Sitting on the tip of her tongue was her need to talk about it. She wasn’t drunk last night. Now she was unsure if she were sorry or what. In fact, her confusion about the whole incident left her not knowing quite what to say.

Jim preferred to spend the night outside, all alone in the dreary cold, on the streets rather than stay with her. The crazy part was he failed to realize what a slap in the face that was to Kayla.

Everything inside her said not to allow him to shelve her. Nearly recoiling at his dismissive and insulting reaction to her now, when he was the one who instigated the whole scene, and shocked by his desire to initiate the sex, no matter how spectacular it turned out to be, was very strange coming from a man who hadn’t done more than kiss his fiancée.

Her sister, Kathy.

Kayla had slept for a few hours but was as discombobulated as Jim right now.

Then guilt ripped into her. Had she somehow betrayed Kathy? No telling anyone about this, just in case. Which meant she had no one to ask for advice or just to vent with. Usually, that person was Kathy, but for obvious reasons, not this time.

“Do you think I betrayed my sister somehow? I mean, I know she and you aren’t together anymore, but that was last night. Everything happened last night.” She pressed her hand to her mouth, looking more confused. Her brain was fuzzy and her stomach empty. The acid started to rise up her throat.

“No.” Jim’s tone was harsh, simple and crystal clear.

She kind of felt guilty though. But obviously, Jim offered her nothing emotionally with him.

Weariness crashed into her with the force of a bagful of concrete being swung at her temple. The church shooting, the pool of blood, the shock and violence of yesterday. The long wait at the hospital and worry for both Eric and Kathy. Kayla’s decision to check up on Jim and now here she was. Confused. Sexed up. Having sex with her sister’s ex. His ex-fiancée. And within only a few hours after their relationship ended. But was it wrong? Was it okay? What mattered now? What was real anymore?

She obviously needed coffee. Sleep. And a good meal.

Not Jim.

“I’ll go…” She stepped back, clutching her purse. Looking bewildered and suddenly very timid, which she never was before, she realized what she was doing and ground her teeth for allowing Jim to take her sense of comfort from her.

He didn’t acknowledge her. Her heart sinking, she already had her answer.

Leave. Go. Be done with it. Never think of him or this night again.

So much easier said than done. And she rarely bullshitted herself. Not about that.

After sleeping for a few hours, Jim slogged through a shower and found some clean clothes. Looking respectable, despite everything he did, he banished Kayla from his thoughts as he parked his old sedan in the church parking lot. Police tape was still flapping in the breeze out front. Cleared for entrance, his stomach pinched in pain. He had to enter the war zone that was once his sanctuary. His refuge from a chaotic, pointless, harsh planet. Gee, as predicted, it followed him here. Shaking his head to avoid a bout of self-pity, he decided he didn’t have it that bad. He ate well and had a decent shelter, a good job and the people associated with this place respected him. It was more than he managed to attain for most of his life. He was grateful when he compared himself to many others around the world.

His effort to find a connection and form a family of his own seemed a failure. But he didn’t really know how to do it. He couldn’t get Kathy to feel comfortable with him, let alone,