Young Adulting - Christina Benjamin Page 0,47

that me and my lips had ruined his chances for a deal. I’d told him word for word what I’d said to Colin in the hopes that it would make him feel better about the mess I’d made. But now his question…

He was asking as a friend, I knew that.

But was he jealous?

Should he be jealous?

I paused with my fingers hovering over the phone as if the response would magically come to me. My first instinct was to lie—to say that the kiss hadn’t meant anything and that he had nothing to worry about.

The fact that my first instinct was to lie made me question everything, though. That wasn’t me. I didn’t lie to people just to get my way.

Colin’s little speech had clung to me like wet clothes that I couldn’t wriggle out of. They made me uncomfortable and cold to the bone.

He’d been implying that I was willing to do whatever it took.

Was I?

After a few more moments of stewing, I decided to tell the truth. The whole truth. In a flurry of typing I told Leo that I had feelings for Henry. That I liked him, and that maybe I liked Leo, too. I told him all about how confused I was. How torn.

But how, at the end of the day, I couldn’t let my feelings for either of them stand in the way of my dreams.

If I let Henry into my life… If I tell him how I feel and he feels the same, then even if I succeed, I’ll never know if I’d earned it or if I’d been handed a win because I was dating someone powerful.

I know you probably can’t understand that, and Henry probably won’t either. But I need to end this flirtation with you and I have to stop this thing with Henry before it goes any further because…

Because I’ve come this far for my dreams. And I can’t go back.

I hope you understand. I hope Henry will, too.

When I hit send I felt like I’d just poured my heart and soul out to Leo. And to be honest, it was probably what I should have said to Henry. But tonight, I couldn’t handle the thought of Henry’s reaction.

Because if he tried to convince me otherwise...if he tried to sway me into choosing him over my career…

I wasn’t sure I could say no.

Chapter Fifteen

Henry

I stared at Izzy’s email, my heart beating like a kickdrum in my chest as cuddly little cherubs circled around me trumpeting in triumph.

If I let Henry into my life… If I tell him how I feel and he feels the same.

I don’t know how many times I’d read and reread that line, but I couldn’t stop smiling. How could I when I knew she felt the same? That kiss had meant as much to her as it had to me.

I knew it!

Well, actually I hadn’t. I’d been downright doubtful after her cold reaction to me this afternoon.

But I could admit, things hadn’t gone as I’d planned at Polarizing Pictures. I’d let that tyrant, Taylor, get under my skin. I knew better, but that girl was a real piece of work. No wonder Izzy was so stressed about pitching. Competing against that girl had to be like swimming with sharks.

I knew Izzy was serious about her job, but after crossing paths with the other ruthless interns at the studio, I was even more impressed that she’d managed to get my script to the next level. I mean, my script was good, but there were plenty of good scripts out there. Having someone like Izzy fight for it was what made all the difference.

Taking a few deep breaths to quell my racing heart, I tried again to get through the rest of Izzy’s email without letting my emotions run away with me. I channeled Leo, trying to focus on what she was saying about the script rather than my feelings for her.

If I let Henry into my life… If I tell him how I feel and he feels the same, then even if I succeed, I’ll never know if I’d earned it or if I’d been handed a win because I was dating someone powerful.

I know you probably can’t understand that, and Henry probably won’t either. But I need to end this flirtation with you and I have to stop this thing with Henry before it goes any further because…

Because I’ve come this far for my dreams. And I can’t go back.

I hope you understand. I hope Henry will,