breath before I raise my hand and knock on the door.
When the door opens, it’s not Anna who opens it, but the guy I was so ready to kill earlier, and he doesn’t look too pleased to see me.
I shove my hands deep into my pockets so he knows I’m not here to cause any problems. “Anna here?”
The man doesn’t make a move to clear out of my path, and I’m impressed that even after what I did to him, he’s willing to stand his ground. “I don’t think she wants to see you right now.”
I swallow hard. “I know I fucked up. At least let me come in and apologize to her.”
He shakes his head. “You hurt her enough. Why don’t you—“
“Jorge,” Anna calls from inside the room. “It’s okay. Let him in.”
Jorge? The same Jorge she was supposed to marry? I eyeball the guy, and it’s clear why her father would pick a guy like that for her. He’s the complete opposite of me in every way, and probably more deserving of her than me, but I refuse to allow him to have her.
Jorge steps back and I pass by him.
Anna’s sitting in the middle of the bed in her room. Her legs are curled underneath her, and her face is red and swollen where she’s been crying.
Jesus, I’m a piece of shit for doing that to her.
A woman with the same dark hair and green eyes as Anna pushes up from the bed and approaches me with her hand extended. “I’m Maria Cortez. Anna’s mother.”
I nod, easily seeing the example. “Xavier Cold.”
“I figured,” she replies. “My daughter is a good girl. Make this right with her.” She turns back to Anna. “Call me if you need me, mija. Our offer for you to come home always stands.”
Anna nods. “Okay.
Maria kisses the top of Anna’s head and heads toward the door. “Come on, Jorge.”
“You don’t think we should stay?” he questions as she passes by him.
She grabs the door handle. “No. They can handle things from here.”
Jorge sighs, and it’s easy to see that while Anna may be over him, he’s not over her and it kills him to leave her alone with me. But, he’s an obedient guy and does as he’s asked. “Goodbye, Anna.”
When we’re alone in the room, I clear my throat. “When did you find out about the baby?”
“After my very first show on Tension. I fell, and had to get checked out by the trainer. They drug tested me and gave me a pregnancy test.” She quiet for a moment. “I tried to call and tell you, but you never answered me.”
Things begin to click. Not only was she upset that she thought I was blowing her off, but she was going through some real shit and I wasn’t there for her.
“I’m sorry, Anna, for everything. I handled wrong. I wish I could go back and have a do-over.” She doesn’t even look at me and I know I’ve hurt her bad, but I need to see her eyes so I can tell what she’s thinking. “Anna . . .”
“I’m sorry, Xavier, I can’t—“
Before she has a chance to finish that sentence I drop to my knees by her side. “Whatever you’re going to say, don’t. Please, don’t. Anna, look at me.” She reluctantly shifts her eyes in my direction. “Don’t end this. Don’t end us. I’ll do whatever you want to make you stay with me. I can’t live my life without you, Anna.”
Her lips twist as she stares into my eyes. “Then tell me the truth, Xavier. Tell me everything that you’re hiding from me. Help me understand you and why you keep pushing me away.”
I lock my fingers together on the bed in front of me, and then drop my head onto my arms. Telling her everything, it might change the way she sees me. I don’t want her pity—never wanted that—but if exposing the demons of my past to her is what makes her stay, then she’s about to get an earful.
I raise my head and take a deep breath. “Where do you want me to start?”
“At the beginning,” she whispers. “Talk to me instead of getting angry all the time.”
And so it begins. I launch into my earliest childhood memories of all the good times I spent with my mother, and then how things got really hard when she figured out my father, whoever he was, was never coming back. I tell her about all the drugs, living