But I,d rather call myself a man wolf. I do actually retain my full consciousness in this state, as ought to be plain enough to you. But it,s not that simple. There are hormones flooding me in this state and they work on my emotions. I am Reuben, yes, but I,m Reuben under a new series of influences. And no one really knows to what extent hormones and emotions influence free will and conscience and inhibition and moral habit."
"Yes, that,s so true, and nobody would word that quite like you just did except my little brother, Reuben."
"Phil Golding didn,t bring up any sons who couldn,t obsess over cosmic questions."
Jim laughed. "And where is Phil now when I need him?"
"Don,t go there," said Reuben. "What we say here is sealed."
"Amen, that,s without question."
Reuben waited.
Then he said:
"It,s easy to kill, easy to kill people reeking of guilt. No, that,s not it. They don,t reek of guilt. They reek of intent to do evil."
"And other people, innocent people?"
"Other people smell just like people. They smell innocent; they smell healthy; they smell good. That must be why the beast in Mendocino let me go. He caught me in the midst of his attack on two killers. And he let me go, perhaps knowing what he,d done to me, what he,d passed on to me."
"But you don,t know who or what he is."
"No. Not yet. But I,m going to find out, that is, if there is any way that I can. And there,s more to it all than meets the eye, I mean, more connecting what happened to that house and the family. But it,s too soon to try to make sense of it yet."
"Tonight. Have you killed tonight?"
"No, I have not. But it,s early, Jim."
"The whole city,s looking for you. They,ve got more traffic-light cameras put up. They have people watching the rooftops. Reuben, they have satellite capabilities now to watch the rooftops. They know that,s how you travel. Reuben, they,re going to catch you. They,re going to shoot you down! They,re going to kill you."
"It won,t be that easy, Jim. Let me worry about that."
"Listen, I want you to turn yourself over to the authorities. I will go home with you. We will call Simon Oliver and get the litigator in the firm, what,s-his-name, Gary Paget, and - ."
"Stop it, Jim. Not going to happen."
"Little Boy, you can,t handle this on your own. You,re tearing human beings limb from limb - ."
"Jimmy, stop."
"You expect me to give you absolution for - ."
"I didn,t come for absolution. You know that. I came for this to be secret! You can,t share this with anyone, Jim. You,ve made that promise to God, not just to me."
"That,s true, but you must do as I tell you. You must go to Mom and explain all this. Look, let Mom run tests, let her figure out what the physical components of this thing are, how or why it,s happening. Mom,s been contacted by some specialist from Paris, some Russian doctor, really bizarre name, Jaska, I think, but this doctor claims to have seen other cases, cases in which strange things have happened. Reuben, this is not the first time - ."
"Not on your life."
"We don,t live in the Dark Ages, Reuben. We,re not roaming around nineteenth-century London! Mom is the perfect person to shed real light on - ."
"Are you serious? You think Mom is going to set up a Frankenstein-style lab with this Jaska guy and research this little project on her own? Will they get a humpbacked helper named Igor to run the MRIs and mix the chemicals? You think she,s going to strap me to an iron chair when the sun sets so I can froth and roar in a little prison cell? You,re dreaming. One word to Mom and I,m finished, Jim. She,ll have to call in the finest scientific minds of her generation, the Paris specialist be damned. That,s the way she,s made. That,s what the world would expect of her, that she,ll get on the phone to the NIH. And in the meantime, she,d seek with all her power to confine me so I couldn,t ,harm, anyone else and that would be the end, Jim. The end. Or the beginning of Reuben,s life as an experimental animal under lock and key and government supervision. How long do you think it would be before I disappeared completely into some government facility? She couldn,t stop that from happening.