wasn’t also experiencing suspicion and anger and dissatisfaction.
I was moving on. And so was Hayle.
Yesterday, Tristin, Leo, and I had accompanied him to the cliff where Lily died to spread her ashes. It might have seemed like a morbid choice for her final resting place, but it made sense, in a strange way. There, she’d chosen to let go of that tree, of her life, of Hayle. And he’d stood in the same spot where he’d watched her fall to let go of her.
Not that he was going to get over everything that had happened so quickly. Even when he laughed and joked with his brothers, I could detect his melancholy beneath the surface. Though he hadn’t spoken much about it, I knew he was struggling with guilt over the last words she’d spoken to him. His mother had blamed his supposed betrayal for no longer having a reason to live. That wasn’t something he would ever forget.
For his sake, I just hoped that he would someday find a way to forgive himself and his mother. His memories of her would always be tainted. I knew that. But I also knew from experience that old hurts faded with time. Lily hadn’t been the person he’d always believed. Still, she’d loved him in the best way she’d known how. It hadn’t been his fault that her mind had twisted that love into something ugly. And, when I allowed myself to look at it from a logical perspective, it hadn’t been her fault either.
She’d needed help for many years, and the one person who’d had enough information to get her that help had turned a blind eye. That was why, though Hayle and Vincent had made a fragile peace over the last few days, I doubted their relationship would ever fully recover. Hayle could get over all of the lies and secrets. What he couldn’t get over was his father’s choices regarding Lily. Vincent could have pushed the issue—demanded that she get the help she needed—and he hadn’t.
I glanced down at my lap, unable to stop the smile that split my face. While my mind had wandered, I’d managed to finish my drawing. It was more intricate than my typical sketches, full of details and vibrant colors that could only be achieved with the professional colored pencils I’d bought with part of my gift card for the art supply store that had been a Christmas gift from Vincent. Quality supplies weren’t everything when it came to drawing, but they sure helped.
However, those intricacies weren’t what caused me to smile like a lunatic. It was the sight of much younger versions of the Sharpe brothers perched on the edge of the dock, popsicles in their hands. Unlike the original drawing from all of those years ago that had inspired this one, Hayle no longer set himself apart from Tristin and Leo. The three of them sat hip to hip, their expressions joyous as they laughed with their entire faces and bodies.
This new drawing wasn’t a realistic representation of the brothers’ relationship back then. But realism hadn’t been my intention. If anything, it was a sign of the hope that currently bubbled in my chest. In many ways, Hayle, Leo, and Tristin had more in common with those young boys today than they had five months ago. And I couldn’t help but believe they would continue to grow closer over coming months and years.
“Time to go,” Leo shouted up the stairs, startling me into action. A glance at the clock told me he was right. I had totally lost track of time.
“Be down in ten,” I called back before stripping out of my clothes as I made my way into the bathroom to touch up my hair and makeup. Then, I pulled on a pair of skinny jeans, riding boots, and a soft blush-colored cowl neck sweater.
We were going to a bonfire to kick off the new semester, so warmth was important. It was put on by one of the fraternities and, according to Leo, was always one of the biggest events of the year.
At the bottom of the stairs a minute later, I stopped short at the sight of my boyfriends. “Oh my god. What are you wearing?”
They’d donned matching hoodies in different colors—Hayle’s was yellow, Tristin’s emerald green, and Leo’s Harbor U maroon. But it was the heart over each of their chests with my name scrawled through it that had me gawking.