share that happiness. I understand that right now my words might not seem true. You may have more sad days than happy ones. But all things change, my precious girl, change like the castles in the sky. So when you’re in Thailand, try to be happy, try to run free. Draw a picture for me in the sand and know that I’ll be watching from above.
I love you,
Mommy
Mattie reread her mother’s words, then rolled up the little scroll and placed it in the canister. She leaned back in her chair, watching the ocean below. Sitting near the rooftop pool of their hotel, she had an unobstructed view of the Andaman Sea—an infinite swath of azure-colored water that bordered an immense white-sand beach. Hundreds of red and blue umbrellas lined the near side of the beach, which was packed with thousands of locals and tourists. Though the beach was at least a mile long, very few stretches were free of people.
“What did she say, luv?” Ian asked, looking at Mattie, taking off his T-shirt so that the sun would touch more of his skin.
Mattie pocketed the canister. “She wants me to be happy. She talked about how Buddha said that happiness should be shared.”
He nodded, thinking about Kate’s poem, wondering if she was right, hoping that she was. “When you see statues of Buddha, Roo, you’ll see that he’s usually smiling. Even though his life was no picnic.”
“What did Mommy say to you?”
“She said that she’s still with us. And she wanted us to swim in the ocean.”
“Should we go swimming? Right now?”
Ian looked below. The island of Phuket, which he’d grown to know so well with Kate by his side, was hardly recognizable. The dirt roads and water buffalo, virgin beaches and thatched huts were gone. In their place were busy boulevards and bars, cigarette boats and high-rise hotels. Paradise had been found and lost. In fifteen years. Where they’d once listened to crashing waves, horns and screeches now dominated the air, which, depending on the wind, sometimes carried the scent of burning plastic from a distant dump. Perhaps Ian would come to enjoy this new Phuket, this twisted version of what he’d known. But today was not a day for such discoveries. He would never feel Kate here, try as he might, because the world they had shared was gone.
He turned around, looking at the beautiful swimming pool, the lounge chairs, the unfinished drinks on glass tables. At least the mountains behind them seemed unchanged, green rises that mirrored the waves below. “I reckon we should buzz off for a different island,” he said, shaking his head.
“Why?”
“Look at that street. There’s a bloody Macca’s on the corner.”
“A McDonald’s?”
“And a Starbucks, for the love of God. They’ve . . . they’ve kicked this island in the teeth.”
Mattie scratched at a bug bite near her ankle. “How did it look before?”
He shook his head, handing her a pair of sunglasses. “You should wear your sunnies.”
“How did it look?”
“Well, your mum and I, we used to stay in a little bamboo bungalow near the beach. There was only one paved road, and we’d ride it at night on our motorcycle. We’d maybe see a taxi or two, but that was it. I could switch off the headlamp and follow the street by the light of the stars.” Ian reached into his day pack and handed Mattie a tube of anti-itch cream. “I don’t blame the Thais . . . for this. They only want to make heaps of loot like everyone else. But still, I reckon we should go. There are islands farther from here, places that I hope are still the same.”
“What if they aren’t?”
“That would steal the wind from my sails, to tell the truth. Just like last night, when that little boy ran away with our laundry. But the deeper we go into the sea out there, the farther we’ll get from all this madness.”
“But it wasn’t his fault. He was hungry. He needed the money.”
“I know, luv. I know.”
Mattie smeared the anti-itch cream on her bug bite, aware that her father would have rather given the boy some money, some job than see him steal their clothes. Seeing that had made him feel helpless.
As her father stared into the distance, Mattie thought about her mother’s words, about how one candle might light another. “Let’s go, Daddy,” she said, standing up. “Let’s find another island.”
FIVE MINUTES INTO THE FERRY RIDE FROM Phuket to the island of Ko Phi Phi,