For The Win (Gamer Girls, #6) - Auryn Hadley Page 0,96

up, meeting Rhaven's eyes. "Please don't break his heart?"

"I like him a lot," Rhaven admitted, "but I think we both know I'm going to bring the wrong attention to him." She worked the next piece of cable as tight as she could. "The Kings of Gaming have it in for me."

"I heard," Dez said. "You need to tell Riley."

"Tonight," Rhaven agreed.

Dez just sat back on her knees, then dusted off her hands. "I'm going to give you a piece of advice, and it's the sort of thing that makes more sense after the fact, but try to trust your friends, Rhaven. Let people help. Let them shield you. I'm going to make a wild guess that you're used to pushing others away because it's safer, but that's a bad habit."

She nodded. "I've kinda seen that over the last few days. I mean, Kate spent so much money on me. Well, Adam's money, but still."

"And it's not going to stop," Dez said. "People will do nice things, and your gut will tell you to run, to brush it off, or to minimize it. Instead, try saying thank you. Just those words are enough." She paused. "It's going to get worse, Rhae."

"What more can they do to me?"

"Embarrass you? Keep hitting you where it hurts until you're sure you can't take anymore? Catch you in a dark corner and make that pain the physical kind? These people want to destroy you. They don't care how, and they aren't worried about the repercussions." Dez sighed. "I couldn't do it. They broke me, Rhaven. Don't let them break you, ok? Get drunk. Get stoned. Get addicted to something and trust that your friends will help you climb out of whatever hole you use to hide, because none of those things matter. Just don't..." Her tongue darted over her lips. "Don't ever quit. Do you understand what I'm saying?"

"Suicide," Rhaven breathed.

Dez nodded. "It starts to sound good after a bit, you know?"

Rhaven just turned her arm, exposing the scars. "I do."

"But every time it does, remember the things you would've missed." Dez looked over at Chance. "Think about the ones who'll cry at your funeral, because they do exist. We convince ourselves that we're doing them a favor, but we really aren't. There are some people in this world who'd much rather wade through the shit beside you than lose you." She looked back. "I'm one. Braden. Half of those pro gamers."

"You really think it's going to get that bad?" Rhaven asked. "Dez, I'm nobody."

"Bullshit," Dez countered. "You're an out trans woman. You're dating a developer at Deviant. You're friends with the top gamers in the country. You're also damned good. All of those things add up to be a threat to these guys. You are gaining power and they are losing it, so they will try to break you - just like they break any woman who gets above herself."

"But Riley..." Rhaven tried.

Dez shrugged. "Riley's unbreakable. They come at her and she keeps winning. Every time it happens, Riley looks better and KoG looks worse. Oh, they'll keep trying to take her down, but they can't. Their threats don't hurt her. Their words don't even slow her down. They call her a bitch and she wears the title like a crown. They try to kill her and she screams even louder. They can't hurt her - but they can hurt the people around her."

"We're her weakness?" Rhaven asked.

Dez nodded. "And once she breaks, they will pounce. That's how they work. Do you know how many casual gamers they've targeted? Do you have any idea how many get bullied until they quit, cancel their accounts, or kill themselves? They're fucking winning, Rhaven, and I can't stop them! Don't break Braden's heart. If it hurts, come see me, but do not take that last step without talking to me first, ok? Promise me that?"

"I promise," Rhaven said without needing to think about it. "Dez, this is the best my life has been. For the first time, I can see the light at the end of the tunnel."

Dez nodded. "Just don't let them dim that. Don't let those fuckers take away your dreams, because it's hard as fuck to get them back."

"No, I'm kinda ready to fight back."

"I'm ready to win," Dez said just as the curtain opened.

Both women turned to see Riley striding into the booth. "Braden!" she barked before stopping.

"I am holding a fifty-pound monitor over my head," Braden called back. "So tell Gavin to