For The Win (Gamer Girls, #6) - Auryn Hadley Page 0,19

jarhead, but he didn't act like it. Then there were his full, sensual lips that seemed to curl upwards just a little more than everyone else's.

And he wondered why she was nervous?

"I just can't figure out why you wanted to see me," she finally said.

He leaned over the arm of his couch. "Pretty sure I already answered that in about as many ways as I can."

"But I don't get it!" she insisted. "Look at you, Braden. You're one of the hot guys. Why would you put in this much effort for a mess like me?"

"Hot?" he asked, those lips curling upwards again. "So, guess that means you're not turning me down yet, huh?"

Rhaven just threw up a hand - the one not holding her beer - and huffed at him. "Braden. Please. See, what you don't get is that I'm only myself at the conventions. Here? I'm just Ethan, the dorky younger brother of one of the jocks, and the 'son' of that nice guy who makes cabinets."

"No mom?" he asked.

She shook her head. "No. My parents got divorced when I was in second grade. Dad fought for custody because - and you're going to love this - boys need their dad. He got it, and Mom moved out of state."

"So, what do you think she'd say about your transition?" he asked.

All Rhaven could do was take a sip, hoping for a moment to figure out how to answer. "We're not close."

"Didn't say you were," he assured her. "Just... Babe, tell me if I'm wrong or out of line, ok? I'm getting the impression that you don't want to tell your family because you don't have a place to go if they're not ok with it. Am I wrong?"

"No," she mumbled.

He nodded. "Ok. Which means you have a reason to think your mother wouldn't be any more accepting, right?"

She nodded. "Mom got into religion when she got divorced. No new husband. Just a lot of volunteering and stuff."

"Yeah, that would scare the shit out of me," he agreed. "But I'm willing to bet you have a plan. How do I help?"

She reached over to set her beer down because her hands were shaking. "I started hormones just before Christmas. They asked if I'd been living as a woman, and I kinda lied and said yes, but I had pictures of me at the conventions. I mean, it's Planned Parenthood, so they make things easier, you know?"

"Nice," he said, sounding honestly impressed.

She jiggled her head in agreement. "And it's working. I mean, I never had a deep voice, but it's changing a bit. Other things too. It's just really slow, and I can't decide if I'm excited to finally look like a woman or if this is more of a countdown that I've given myself, but I feel better. I feel more like myself every day - which you probably don't understand."

"Not personally," he admitted, "but I dated a transgender person in college. A guy, actually."

That made her pause. "Really?"

"Really," he promised. "His name was Toby, and he loved anal sex and strap-ons. He went through top surgery but didn't want bottom surgery, and he had some very serious dysphoria. No sex with the lights on kinda situation, but I was ok with that. You?"

She just shook her head. "I'm ok."

"You can tell me to fuck off," he said gently. "And so you know, I was more asking about your situation at home than the rest."

"I have depression," she said. "It used to be really bad, but since I started the hormones, it's been better." Then she winced, realizing how that sounded. "I'm not saying hormones fixed my depression. I just mean..."

"That it was a step that felt good," he finished for her. "No, I get it."

"Yeah, but at the same time, it makes my dad worry about me. I tried to kill myself when I was in middle school. He found me bleeding out and rushed me to the hospital, but he couldn't afford to keep me going to a therapist. So, he just worries. And there's my brother. I think he'd be ok if I said I was gay, but I'm not! And the problem is that I don't know how to explain this to them. I have no idea how to even start that conversation, so I just find myself putting it off, you know?"

"I do," Braden promised. "I kept telling myself I'd introduce my mom to one of my boyfriends, but I couldn't. When it came time,