pleasure drug, only without the pleasure,” she said. “There’s no rush, no high, nothing. You don’t feel it at all. At least, not until you stop taking it. The body gets used to it alarmingly quickly, then starts to crave it. I’ve tested the effects of doroxian in the past in collaboration with other physicians, but no one really understands exactly what it does to the body. All I know is, I’ve had patients come to me shaking, crying, running a fever. Once they stop taking doroxian, they get sick. Terribly sick. And so far, nothing has worked to combat the withdrawals doroxian causes…”
Tauran’s world tilted. He felt he might be sick, the morning’s breakfast pressing into his throat. He gripped the edge of the table beside him and squeezed until his joints hurt. No, it couldn’t be right. “How…” His throat was dry as sand. He swallowed and tried again. “How bad does it get?”
Erica’s voice was gentle. “It depends on how long it’s been. A few days shouldn’t cause much of an issue. A few weeks—”
Tauran counted the weeks in his head, heart sinking. “Two months?” Tauran’s eyes bore into hers.
“If your friend has been taking them every day for two months, stopping suddenly would be… unwise.”
“But how bad does it get?” Tauran pressed, leaning forward. “Could he…” He didn’t want to say the word, couldn’t say it.
“In a worst case scenario, it’s not impossible,” Erica said. “I… have lost one patient to doroxian. But Tauran, I’ve seen the recovery of several others with a slow and controlled decrease of the drug. Even ones taking doroxian as long as your friend.”
A choked sound left Tauran against his will and he hid his face in his hands, stars dancing at the corners of his vision. “This can’t be happening.” Kalai’s life was in danger? Falka had given him that drug. Did he even know what was in it? He had to talk to them both.
A hand on Tauran’s shoulder made him flinch, and he looked up. Erica stood beside him. “If you bring your friend to see me, I’ll do what I can to help. We can work out a decrease schedule, control his withdrawals. It doesn’t have to end badly.”
Tauran nodded slowly, at least partially comforted by her words. Kalai wasn’t going to die. They could manage it. He’d be okay. “All right. Yeah. I will.”
“As soon as possible,” she added. “It’s important.”
* * *
At the edge of Lavender Square, Tauran hesitated. Going left would take him to Kalai. Going right would take him to the guard grounds, and to Falka, with whom Tauran itched to have a serious word. But his affection for Kalai won over his anger at Falka, and he went left, limping down the street, not caring who stared.
Surely, Falka couldn’t have known about the drug.
Right?
Falka had assured Kalai it had no nasty side effects.
But Erica had said most of what was in the pill was doroxian.
He thought about Kalai’s episode in the tower. When Tauran asked if he felt like the pills had helped, Kalai said the episode had been a particularly bad one. Was Falka deliberately feeding Kalai a dangerous, addictive drug? And if he was, the overarching question was: why?
It made no damn sense.
Reaching the archive, Tauran pounded on the door. “Kalai!” he barked. He shifted restlessly. Knocked again. No answer.
Leaving the front door, Tauran circled the building. He looked through the window. A lamp was on at the desk in the main room, but Kalai wasn’t there. Had he gone out? Tauran had to make sure.
Making his way to the back of the building, Tauran found a window left ajar. With a wince, he wiggled his fingers through and lifted the latch, pushed the window open and hopped onto the frame.
“Kalai?” he called, dropping onto the floor. He reached for his belt. He had his knife, but he had left his pistol at tower. Stupid.
“Tauran? Up here.” Kalai’s voice filtered from upstairs.
Relief washed over Tauran. He pulled the window closed and scaled the stairs two steps at a time, ignoring the twinge in his leg. Kalai lay curled up on the bed, wrapped in blankets.
“Hey, what’s wrong?” Tauran sank down onto the mattress.
Kalai’s face was pale, hair sticking to his forehead with sweat. “I don’t feel so good. Sorry, I was going to come down when I heard you call, but I feel dizzy. I didn’t want to take the stairs.” He rolled onto his back and rested a hand