Who We Could Be - Chelsea M. Cameron Page 0,36
even thought twice about it.
“You’re shaking,” Tessa said, turning to look at me. I still had my arm clamped around her, and it was an effort to remove it.
“I’m sorry,” I said, and suddenly I was so embarrassed that I wanted a portal to open up in the floor and suck me into a different dimension where I would forget what I’d just done.
Unable to do anything else, I picked up Tessa’s drink and downed it. Tessa blinked at me. It might be dim in here, but I would have seen her blush flashing like a neon sign in the darkest, deepest cave. She must be totally embarrassed by me.
This little venture had been a huge mistake.
“We should go,” I said, looking into the empty cup. I wasn’t much of a drinker, so I was on the road to making even more bad decisions.
“Okay,” she said.
THE ONLY TALKING WE did on the way back was Tessa telling me where to turn so we didn’t get lost.
“I’m sorry,” I said as we stepped into the hotel lobby. Thunder rumbled in the distance. The forecast was for storms all night.
“For what?” she said, not meeting my eyes.
“For...that,” I said. I couldn’t even put words to what “that” was. “For being a total weirdo back there.”
People kept walking by us, and we moved to the side of the lobby, where a few chairs grouped around a small table. I fell into one of them. Tessa sat next to me.
“It’s fine,” she said, and I waited for her to say more. Tessa always had more to say. The only time I ever got truly worried about her was when she wasn’t talking. “I’m tired, can we go upstairs?”
Her eyes kept darting around, like she didn’t want anyone to see her or something.
“Yeah,” I said, and we got in the elevator significantly less upbeat than we’d been when we’d left.
TESSA WENT RIGHT FOR the shower when we got back to the room. I sat by the sliding glass door and watched raindrops patter and slide down the glass and lightning split itself across the sky.
I needed to get out of my skirt, but I couldn’t do anything. Something was happening to me and I couldn’t even move. The thoughts I’d had off and on and that had stalked my dreams were bubbling up, and I was powerless to stop them.
Something was happening. Something big. Something that I’d never be able to go back from.
Tessa came out of the bathroom in her pajamas, her hair wet and falling on her forehead. I wanted to push it back and out of her eyes.
“You want to go?” she asked, rubbing a towel on her hair. I wanted to tell her not to do that, it was going to make her ends split, but I couldn’t. There was too much else going on inside me that she wasn’t even aware of.
“Yeah,” I said, somehow getting to my feet. They moved without me noticing and the next thing I knew, I was turning off the shower and getting out. I’d forgotten to bring clothes in with me, but Tessa must have put them on the counter for me while I’d been under the water.
My hair dripped down my back, making a little puddle on the floor.
I wasn’t the same person I’d been when I’d gotten into the shower and I desperately needed to talk to someone about it.
The only one I had was Tessa.
Ten
Tessa
Monty was acting totally strange ever since we’d walked into that bar, and I didn’t know how to ask her what was going on. She came out of the shower and found me sitting in front of the sliding glass doors with the lights off, watching the lightning.
“Remember when we used to do this?” I asked her.
“And your mom would make frappes,” she said, coming to sit beside me.
“Let’s order some from room service,” I said, hopping up. I called the order in and grabbed the wide-tooth comb that she used to detangle her hair.
“Come on, you didn’t even brush it out. Are you okay?” She turned and presented me her back. I dabbed at her hair with the towel before dividing it into sections and, starting at the ends, began gently pulling the comb through.
“I have something to tell you,” she whispered. Lightning lit up the room, and I was interrupted from answering her by the arrival of the frappes. I tipped the server and handed her a frosted glass. She took it in both hands.
“What