Who We Could Be - Chelsea M. Cameron Page 0,16

to do, Cin?” I whispered. Cute animals could only distract me so much.

“I’m going to help you cancel all that shit, and you’re going to send a message to that girl, and then you’re going to move on. Because he’s not worth it. He’s not worth it. He never has been.” Her tone was bitter, and I could tell it wasn’t just from the cheating.

“I know you’ve never liked him,” I said. “You aren’t as subtle as you think you are.”

“How was I supposed to like him?” Her voice startled all the kittens and they cried. “I’m sorry.” She apologized and gave them all kisses. “But it’s true. He wasn’t even worthy to fix your car, god Ford. How did you expect me to feel?” She lowered her voice, but her tone cut me like knives.

“I expected you to support the decision I made.”

Tessa rolled her eyes. “Clearly, he was a bad fucking decision.”

I sat up, startled. “Are you blaming me for him cheating?”

“No, of course not! I’m just saying he wasn’t a good guy, even without that. He’s not good enough for you.” Now I was the one rolling my eyes.

“So, who is good enough for me, because that’s what you’ve said about anyone I tried to date.” I rolled through the guys I’d told her I was interested in that she had shot down. The list was pretty long. True, a lot of those guys were losers, but still. She should let me make my own decisions.

“That’s because no one is good enough for you, least of any of the crusty local guys.”

“Tessa, that’s ridiculous and you know it.” She gently dislodged the kittens in her lap and stood up.

“The fact that you can’t see yourself makes me so angry. You’re amazing and you can’t even see it. You sell yourself short all the time and I’m so tired of it. You deserve better. You deserve the best. I don’t know who that is but admit one thing: you were never happy with TJ. Just admit that, because we both know it’s true.” Those words slashed me open, laid me bare. I couldn’t do this anymore.

I put the kittens down and stood up. “I’ll be in the car.”

Why was she doing this? She was supposed to be helping me feel better, not making me feel more like shit. I got in the car and slammed the door shut. I’d thought I was out of tears, but there they were again. It took a few minutes before Tessa walked out and got in the car with me.

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that.”

I wiped my cheeks. “No shit you shouldn’t have said that.”

“I’m sorry,” she said again, and I looked over and saw that she was crying too. “I just hate him for doing this to you.”

“Yeah, well, that makes two of us.”

We sat in the car, both silently crying for a while. Tessa swiped at her face, turned on the car and pulled out.

“Where are we going?”

“To get some alcohol,” she said.

BOTH OF US DECIDED that going to a bar wasn’t the best idea, mostly because then we’d have no way to get home, so we headed instead to the closest gas station that sold booze. Tessa went in and grabbed whatever, coming out with two bags.

“Getting wasted isn’t cheap, holy shit. But at least it’s cheaper at home than at a bar.”

Since neither of us wanted to get drunk at her parent’s house, we headed back to my place. I kept getting distracted by a rattling in the trunk that had just been getting progressively worse the longer Tessa drove.

“What is going on back there?” Her car was ancient and prone to odd noises, but this was something else.

“It’s all your wedding presents. I figured you wouldn’t want to see them. I also hid all the pictures of TJ, not that there were many.” That was true, I hadn’t had a lot of them up. Come to think of it, I didn’t have a lot of pictures of myself with TJ, not even on my phone. We’d just never taken that many. The only ones I could remember had been sent to me by other people.

“I can delete the ones off your phone if you want.” She still had my phone.

“No, I can do that.” I’d probably throw up while doing it, but it was all part of the process. I wondered if he’d sent me any further messages.

I also still needed to draft a message to