There was clear aggravation in his voice. And regret.
She smiled against his chest. “I don’t care.”
“But I should have protected you better. Are you on anything? Is the timing right for you to get pregnant? I don’t have any diseases, I swear. I haven’t had sex in a damn long time.”
She squeezed him and kissed his collarbone. “I know. We’re fine, Nathan. I’m on birth control and I’m safe too.”
“I’ll buy condoms,” he said gruffly.
She smiled again. He wasn’t even attempting to say that they wouldn’t have sex again. No remorse. No regret for what they’d shared.
It was clear in his tone that he had every intention of making love to her at every opportunity. An assumption she didn’t mind at all.
“If you do, fine. But if you don’t, I’m perfectly okay with not using them. I’d actually prefer not to. With anyone else, I’d insist. But you aren’t just anyone. I hope you know that, Nathan. I’ve never felt this…this connection to anyone else.”
He went quiet for several long moments. She could feel the thud of his heart as his mind worked through a tangle of thoughts.
“Then why did you leave me after my brothers came for me in Afghanistan?”
The quietly voiced question made her heart squeeze. How he must have felt abandoned. It had killed her to go so silent, but she hadn’t any more to give.
She wrapped her arms tighter around him, wanting to ease the gruff hurt in his tone. “I had to. I was too weak. Maintaining the connection for as long as I did had rendered me helpless.”
“Was I the reason they caught you? Were you too weak to escape because of all you did for me?”
She heard the snarl in his voice. He was angry that he could be at fault. She shook her head. “No, Nathan. They didn’t catch me until much later. I moved frequently. I changed my hair color often. Blond to red, back to blond. Brunette, dark and light brown, back to blond. I even wore colored contacts. I tried to change vehicles as often as I could, but I was running out of money and I was scared to hold a job for too long in the same location, which meant keeping the same car. It was how they found me. They tracked me to California. They ran my car off the road, knocked me out, and when I regained consciousness, I was in the hotel room I’d rented.”
He stiffened and then kissed the top of her head as he continued to stroke her body. “How long was it before you escaped?”
“I don’t know,” she said honestly. “What day is it today?”
“June first.”
She couldn’t conceal her sound of dismay.
“What?” Nathan demanded.
“I was with them over a week,” she whispered.
He cursed and buried his face in her hair. “You should have called for me immediately.”
“I tried. I did. They drugged me. They kept me drugged. They would allow me to become lucid only for short intervals so they could question me.”
“I want to kill those sons of bitches.”
“So do I,” she murmured. “Grace isn’t safe. They’ll step up their efforts to find us both now that I’ve escaped.”
“I don’t want you to worry, baby. We’ll work this out, okay? Right now I need for you to know you’re safe and that I’m going to protect you.”
She nodded again. He leaned away and kissed her forehead. “It’s getting close to dark. I’ll need to go out and get us something to eat. I’m not leaving you alone, so that means you ride with me. I wanted to wait until dark so the chances of you being spotted were fewer.”
“And then? What do we do then?” she asked anxiously.
He settled her against the pillows and then swung his legs over the side of the bed, reaching for the boxers and T-shirt he’d discarded hours earlier.
“We need to talk about our options.”
It was the way he said it that made her go tense. Almost as if he knew she may not agree with his plan.
“Okay, what are our options?”
He hesitated a moment and then turned his head to her. “Let’s get you something to eat and then we’ll talk.”
She sat up and pushed her hair from her face. She didn’t have a thing to wear and she wasn’t putting on the same pair of ripped-up, stinky, dirty clothes she’d run all over California and Oregon in.
When she put her plight to Nathan, he frowned as if he hadn’t considered the issue