the side of his small hand against one of them, and it curled around to stroke him.
“Just let me in.”
He reached up for the chain.
“Don’t move!” I shouted.
It came out without me thinking, from my heart as much as my mouth. The fingers retreated immediately and the mail slot snapped shut behind them. Jake turned to look up at me as I thudded down the stairs toward him, my heart hammering in my chest. At the bottom, I snatched the keys out of his hand.
Sitting like that, he was blocking the door.
“Move,” I shouted. “Move.”
He scrabbled out of the way, crawling on his hands and knees into my office. I scraped the chain out of the lock, then tried the door handle, which turned easily—Jake had already unlocked the fucking thing with the keys. Pulling the door open, I stepped quickly onto the front path and stared out into the night.
As far as I could tell, there was nobody up or down the street. The amber haze beneath the streetlights was misty, the pavements empty. But looking across the road, I thought I could see a figure running swiftly across the field. A vague shape, pummeling away through the darkness.
Already too far away for me to catch.
My instinct took me down the front path anyway, but I stopped halfway to the street, my breath visible in the cold night air. What the hell was I doing? I couldn’t leave the house open behind me and go chasing someone across a field. I couldn’t leave Jake in there by himself, alone and abandoned.
So I stood there for a few seconds, staring into the darkness of the field. The figure—if it had ever been here at all—had disappeared now.
It had been here.
I stood there for a moment longer. And then I went back inside, locked the door, and phoned the police.
Part Three
Twenty-two
Credit where it’s due, two police officers arrived on my doorstep within ten minutes of my phone call. After that, things began to go downhill.
I had to take some responsibility for what happened. It was half past four in the morning, and I was exhausted, frightened, and not thinking straight, and the account I had to give was light on detail anyway. But there was no getting away from Jake’s role in what unfolded.
When I’d come back inside to make the call, I’d found him at the bottom of the stairs, hugging his knees and with his face buried in them. I had eventually calmed down enough to calm him down too, and then I’d carried him into the living room, where he’d curled up at one end of the couch. And then refused to talk to me.
I had done my best to hide the frustration and panic I was feeling. I probably hadn’t succeeded.
Even when the police officers joined us in the living room, Jake remained in that same position. I sat down awkwardly beside him. Even then, I was aware of the distance between us, and I was sure it was also very obvious to the police. The two of them—a man and a woman—were both polite and made the requisite concerned and understanding faces, but the woman kept glancing curiously at Jake, and I got the impression the worry on her face was not wholly because of what I was telling them.
Afterward, the male officer referred to the notes he’d made.
“Has Jake sleepwalked before?”
“A little,” I said. “But not often, and only ever to my room. He’s never gone downstairs like that.”
That was if he even had been sleepwalking, of course. While it made me feel better to think he hadn’t been about to open that door out of choice, I realized I couldn’t be sure of that. And Jesus, if that was true, what did it say about how much my son hated me?
The officer made another note.
“And you can’t describe the individual you saw?”
“No. He was quite far away across the field by then, running fast. It was dark, and I couldn’t see him properly.”
“Build? Clothes?”
I shook my head. “No, sorry.”
“Are you sure it was a man?”
“Yes. It was a man’s voice I heard at the door.”
“Could that have been Jake?” The officer looked at my son. Jake was still curled up next to me, staring off into space as though he were the only person in the entire world. “Sometimes children talk to themselves.”
Not something I wanted to get into.
“No,” I said. “There was definitely somebody there. I saw this man’s fingers holding the mail