Where Would I Be Without You - By CJ Hawk Page 0,42

baby who was sleeping in the playpen was now crying profusely. Sophia grabbed her and started to calm her down by rocking her in a standing position, as I stood there looking like a zombie to these people. They did not want to, nor would they probably ever, accept me into their family. It would be just like Marion has to deal with, and I know at times she confided in me that it was not worth it, she should have married a man more of her nature not Carl's status. Did I want to try to make the same mistake even though I felt I was in love with Mason? Could our love be strong enough to defy the expectations of his family?

When he did not answer or defend me, I spoke as if my voice was about to crack into full-blown tears at any moment. "Sophia, thank you for the lovely brunch. I must go now. Mason, if you would not mind, please drive me home. Thank you all so very much for the lovely meal." The last word was teary, and I turned just as tears fell down my face.

I thought I heard a few 'we're sorry' as I started to walk back towards the kitchen. I felt Mason's hand grab mine and practically drag me out of his parents' home. I felt so devastated that I could not say a word the whole way back to our apartment. Mason said very few, but he seemed so full of rage that I think he was retreating to the far recesses of his mind, thinking how dating a woman like me only made his life more miserable.

I wondered if I had just found me another Steve. That I was just his play date until he could find a quality-educated woman that suited his father's request. It was devastating to my confidence to know that I was not up to par in any person's eyes let alone the fact that my mother constantly let me feel that way. I did not need a future Father In-Law to make me feel that way as well.

On the car ride back to my apartment, Mason said very little, and what I did have to say in my defense was spoken in short contrite responses in a very defensive manner. There was truth to the credit part. I had gotten in over my head a few times with credit cards and bills but my dad usually bailed me out. I had worked hard the last two years to be productive but some of those things on my credit would be around for a while. How his sister already knew caused another quick outburst of mean remarks that only brought on more silence from Mason.

Mason tried to kiss me and stay at my place, but I told him to go. The day was young, and I had a full steam of piss and vinegar that was going to force me to log on and start my online college courses today. I think I wanted Mason to think long and hard about if he wanted to keep me as his girlfriend. For both of us, it might be best if we just gave it a rest.

Therefore, I did something completely insane. I texted, not called, but texted him that we needed a break. I turned my cell phone off and unplugged my apartment telephone. I wanted to be unreachable until I could figure this all out. Turning thirty had not turned out to be the grand turning point I had hoped for.

Chapter Ten

Walking back and forth in my apartment, with a glance towards Mason's bedroom every five seconds, was not helping my cause. My head ached with the constant barrage of questions I was asking myself, ones that only Mason could answer, but he couldn't, because I had no intention of talking to him. At least not until I cooled down, not tonight, I needed my space.

Internally, I could hear my mother blaming me on screwing this one up. My dad would offer to take me out for a drink. My aunt Heather would tell me that there are plenty of fish in the sea, which she should know because at her age, she still has not settled down with one man in her life, just married three for a short-term commitment. Bethany would tell me to focus on my now I am thirty plans. I let her read it. She actually liked it and