that you have time off until the next show starts shooting, come out on the road with me. Tour ends in Portland. We can hop a flight to Hawaii and have our secret beach wedding.”
She pulls back and stares at me with wide eyes. “You want to? So soon?”
“Yeah. We keep talking about it. Saying we’ll do it when this is over or that’s done. We’ll have our beach wedding. Spend a few weeks just relaxing with each other. It’ll be perfect.”
“You won’t be upset if your father’s not there?” she asks. “And the club?”
“No, we’ll do a big showy spectacle for our families when your dad gets out.” I roll her on top of me. “But I can’t wait that long for you to be my wife.”
She cups my face with her hands and leans down for a kiss. “I love that idea.”
I hold up my left hand, showing off my ring finger. “Every fucking tabloid will seize on it if I start wearing a wedding band. I’m thinking of getting your name tattooed here instead.”
“Ouch. Won’t that hurt?”
“Nah.” I brush my fingertips over my arms and chest. “No worse than any of these did.”
“You sure…you want something…so permanent?”
I squint at her. “You really need to ask?”
She presses her lips over my heart and peers up at me. “I think it’s kinda sexy.”
The shrill ring of the phone next to the bed jars us out of our love bubble.
“Yes, I’ll come with you,” she answers before I roll over to scoop up the phone.
“Hello, Adams-Dove Loveshack, Chaser speaking.”
Mallory presses her forehead to my chest and giggles.
“Chaser.” Alvin’s shaky voice wipes the smile off my face.
“What’s wrong?” I sit up so fast, Mallory spins onto the mattress with a soft thump.
“Chaser.” He breaks down. Bawling so hard I can barely understand him.
Chills race down my spine. “Alvin. Talk to me. What happened?”
Mallory kneels next to me. “What’s going on?” she mouths.
I shrug, waiting for Alvin to calm down.
“Jacob overdosed. They found him this morning. Outside Creeping Vine.”
“Oh shit. What hospital?” I jump out of bed, swiping my jeans off the floor and shaking them out. “I’ll be there as soon as I can.”
“No.” Alvin sniffles and in that brief pause, the truth barrels down on me. “He’s dead, Chaser.”
Still holding onto the phone, I fall against the edge of the bed, sliding down until my ass hits the floor. “Are you sure?”
He lets out a humorless laugh. “Yes.”
“Fuck. Oh my God.” A thousand waves of guilt crash over my head. I should have gone to the after party with the guys.
The buzz of the rarely used television we keep in the bedroom pulls my attention. Mallory turns the volume all the way down but a picture of Jacob’s smiling face next to the stony-faced VJ delivering the news drives the truth home.
Jacob Whitfield, lead singer of Kickstart, found dead at age twenty-three.
Sobbing, Mallory drops down on the foot of the bed and covers her face with her hands.
“What the hell happened?” I shout into the phone.
“I don’t know.” He cries even harder. “He was drunk but fine when I left.”
“Where’s Garrett?”
“I don’t know. He took off as soon as he heard about Jacob.”
“Did he stay with Jacob after you left?”
“I don’t know!” Alvin yells.
“Okay. I’m sorry. What do you need me to do?”
“Nothing. There’s nothing to do. We’re done. Over. Our singer’s dead. We can’t replace him. The band’s finished.”
I hadn’t gotten that far in my thought process yet.
This isn’t real. It can’t be happening. I open my mouth to refute one of those statements, but nothing comes out.
“Thom said he’ll take care of the funeral arrangements if his parents won’t—” He starts crying again and I feel so fucking useless, sitting there holding a phone listening to my friend break down with no way to comfort him.
Chapter Sixty-Two
Mallory
It’s a blustery, cold day for California the day of Jacob’s funeral.
“Are you ready?” I ask Chaser.
He steps away from the mirror, adjusting his tie. “Jacob would laugh his ass off if he saw me wearing this thing.”
The humorless joke is better than the days Chaser spent riddled with guilt and drowning in despair.
“He probably would.” I reach up and smooth a few runaway spikes of hair off his forehead. A sob catches in my throat. “I feel so bad for teasing him about his outfit the night…the last time…”
He presses his finger against my lips. “Shh. He loved clowning around with everyone.” He takes my hands and steps back. “You look