‘Are you going to do it?’ He looked me in the eyes. ‘What he asked?’
I didn’t like the idea that there was an ‘it’ I was going to do. ‘I mean – I’ll just say we were hanging out, I guess.’ I’d already spoken to Karen, telling her what I was going to say so she didn’t contradict it. So we’re on the same page, I’d said. Mike’s words. She hadn’t protested. I didn’t know where she’d been most of the night either.
Bill looked down at the green carpet. Muffled sounds of college life came in from the quad, and the window cast diamonds of sunlight at our feet. ‘We were away for hours, Al.’
‘Oh, it wasn’t that long.’
‘We left at four. I heard the bells go.’
‘That can’t be right. I looked at the clock in the lodge when we passed.’
‘Sure you did, Ali.’ His voice was bitter. I actually stepped back.
‘What should I do? They’re our friends. I don’t want to get them in trouble. Not when it’s some stranger, some townie who’s got in and . . .’
‘She’s dead, Al. Don’t you think she deserves us telling the truth?’
‘It is the truth. I don’t know what time it was when we left, but I know it was late.’
He stared at me. ‘You don’t have to do this. I’ll help you. I know you’re scared about what’s next, about him, but – you don’t need to be.’
A long moment ticked by. I stared down at the carpet. It did occur to me to wonder why I was doing this for Mike, when all he did was mess me about. But I’d tried for so many years to make him want me, never having any leverage, never any influence over my own relationship. Now that I had some, it was impossible to let it go. ‘I don’t know what you mean.’
Bill sighed. ‘OK, Ali. You do what you have to.’
‘Wait! What did you tell them? The police?’
Bill was already moving away down the stairs, his face in shadow. ‘Don’t worry, Ali. I didn’t say anything you can’t contradict.’ I hated the way his voice sounded.
He walked down the stairs again before I could say anything else, and I heard later on he’d left, catching the coach to Harwich and then a ferry out of the country, and I didn’t see Bill again until Jodi and Callum’s wedding. It was the last time until the night Karen was attacked.
‘Do come in.’ The police seemed kind. There was a younger woman with chestnut hair pulled back, and an older man who was grey-haired and paternal. Deliberate, maybe. A lot of us would be wishing our dads were on hand to sort things. Not me, of course.
I sat down, tucking my feet nervously under the wooden chair, feeling like it was a tutorial I hadn’t done the reading for. They consulted their notes. ‘Alison, I understand you left college at some point before the breakfast, when we discovered Martha.’
It wasn’t Martha any more, I told myself. She was gone, and nothing would bring her back. ‘Just for a walk. With Bill. My friend. The one who was . . .’
‘With Bilal Anwar.’
‘We all call him Bill.’ And it had never occurred to me to ask why, why he felt he couldn’t use his real name with us, his closest friends.
‘Alison. We’ve had you in because I understand you’re close friends with one of the boys we’re looking at, Michael Morris.’
‘That’s right. We’re all friends.’ I rubbed my hands together; they felt clammy.
‘And you and Michael are . . . together? Dating?’
It seemed very important I play this down; I didn’t know why. ‘Oh, not really. Now and again. Friends really.’
‘So he wouldn’t have minded you being off with Bilal.’ This was the woman who spoke. It had never occurred to me that Mike would mind anything I did, but I suddenly wondered. Had he been angry, when he saw I was gone? Had he drunk more than usual?
‘We’re all friends,’ I repeated.
‘When did you last see Michael, before you left?’
I screwed up my eyes. ‘I think he was on the lawn. Getting a drink. A whole bunch of people were there but I just wanted to see the sun come up.’
‘You’re sure you saw him?’
‘Yes, I’m sure.’ And I was sure. We’d had a row, even. I just wasn’t sure what time it was.
‘When was this, Alison?’
‘I’m not sure. Maybe an hour before we got back and the