but he isn’t looking at me. He’s focused on spearing the ham and eating, like I should do. Lord knows I’ve had more to drink than I needed tonight.
With every swallow, questions beg to be spoken.
I barely taste the meal, although the heavy scent of butter and pork makes me believe it should be delicious.
“We may never know the truth, but we did everything we could.” Cody’s statement carries a note of finality. As if it’s the end of the conversation.
A sadness washes over me. I’m sure that’s what he thinks about his brother’s case and it tears me up inside to imagine him as a young boy, being handed paperwork and most likely, told little lies to lessen the blow of what happened to his younger brother.
We did everything we could. I’ve heard it so many times. Everything isn’t always good enough though, is it?
“Eat something.” Cody’s command sounds more like a plea. He even wears a half smile, as if smiling would make the thoughts in my mind disappear.
The atmosphere changes when his gaze softens. “Delilah, baby,” he says, dropping his fork and striding toward me to pin me between him and the counter. A hand rests on either side of me, but he doesn’t touch me. “You haven’t slept, I’m guessing?” he says and he guesses right. “I know you haven’t eaten.”
The way he cares for me, obviously trying to console me, destroys that nagging bit inside that believes he’s being deceitful.
“You need sleep.” With a single kiss on my forehead, suddenly my mother’s warning fades and I remember what my father told me. I trust my instincts from years ago, when I first met and fell for this man. My gut back then said that I could love him. And the part about secrets? Well, just like I told my mother back then, we all have them.
I share one of them right now. “I’ll have nightmares,” I say, whispering the confession, feeling a flurry of fear run through me.
Cody’s eyes flash with shock and then he rests a hand on my chin. “Is that why you aren’t sleeping?” With both of my hands I pull his away, kissing his knuckles and nodding against his chest.
Leaning into him, it’s easy to close my eyes.
He’s gentle as he holds me, rubbing soothing circles on my back and the fight … or whatever that was a moment ago seems to vanish. Disappearing like it never happened.
He plants small kisses along the crown of my head and tells me, “You’re going through hell. You’re stressed and it’s killing you.”
My eyes slowly open and I stare at the curtains as the panel on the right sways gently from the air exiting the floor vent beneath it.
“I know,” I say and it’s all I admit. It feels like I’m drowning, but there isn’t an ounce of water to baptize my sinful soul in.
There’s a rumble in Cody’s chest, deep and masculine when I lift up my lips and kiss his throat, right against his Adam’s apple. The stubble there tickles the tip of my nose.
A contented sigh leaves him and so I do it again.
I let him feel the hint of my smile against his hot skin when the growing erection he has becomes more than obvious.
“Look at what you do to me,” he groans, as if it’s an apology or perhaps like I’m torturing him.
“How about you fuck me to sleep,” I suggest, wanting nothing more than just that. “Make me forget it all.” My murmur pleads with him and in an instant, a yelp is ripped from me as he lifts me by my ass and sets me on the kitchen counter.
The sudden movement has my heart racing but the heat is all from the longing look in his steely blue gaze.
“Now that I can handle,” he says before capturing my lips with his. His touch is strong, unrelenting and easy to get lost in. With his right hand steady on my hip, his left roams up my shirt and lingers over the curve of my waist. I wrap my legs around his hips and press my feet against his ass so I can feel his hard length against my core.
I’m shameless as I grind against him. I only break the kiss to take a breath of cool air, but Cody doesn’t take the moment to pause. He continues his relentless touches, trailing his warm lips down my neck and kissing along every inch. My nipples pebble as a moan