The odd-numbered ones are always my favorite. The trips where I crank the classic rock as loud as my truck’s speakers can handle and grin like a fool until my face hurts.
It’s been thirteen days since I’ve seen my little man. Thirteen days that have fucking sucked in comparison to the two I get to spend with him every other weekend. Those forty-eight hours are the highlight of my weeks, and truth be told, I live every day without Jett just so we can have ones like this.
I don’t mind the drive.
I don’t care that I’ve put a shit ton of miles on my truck running back and forth between his mom’s house and mine.
I don’t give a damn that our visitation arrangement means I have to abandon my crew every other Friday afternoon, sometimes in the middle of a big job.
Nothing matters more than my boy and nothing ever will.
Having a kid was never part of the plan.
But four years later, he’s my only plan.
Just twenty-seven more miles to go.
Chapter 1
HAYDEN
In just a few minutes, my heart will drive away in a Chevy truck.
It happens like clockwork every other Friday night, and there’s nothing I can do but step back and watch it happen.
“Can I bring this?” From his dump truck-style bed, Jett plays with his new Matchbox car while I tuck his stuffed caterpillar, ironically named John Deere, into his weekend bag.
“Of course, you can, sweet pea.” Smiling softly, I pray the tears that already sting in my eyes will hold off until he’s gone.
“Thank you, Mama.” He launches himself into my arms and I melt, burying my face in his mess of golden hair. He smells like cinnamon and sunshine, and I’m not embarrassed to admit that, in the next forty-eight hours, I’ll come into this room at least a dozen times just to breathe him in.
“You’re welcome, baby. I hope you have the best time this weekend.” I press a kiss to his temple, but he pushes away with a dramatic gasp.
“Squishing me,” he wheezes, and I roll my eyes. Where the heck did my little snuggle bug go?
“I’m not going to see you for two whole days, Jett Alexander. I need hugs.” My plea is met with a cool side-eye.
“Daddy here yet?”
A heavy sigh deflates my chest. “Anytime now, baby.”
“You wanna come, too?” His light blue eyes widen at the thought and I grin, because despite the ache in my chest, his innocence is precious. He truly has no idea how difficult these Friday nights are for me or how complicated I made our lives, months before he was even born.
“Nah, honey, you know this time is just for you and Daddy. So you can do all the fun things together, like go fishing and four-wheeling.” And whatever else they do up in Cole Creek, where Jett leads a completely separate life than this one here with me in Green Bay.
“Daddy will like my car. Vroom!” Another bright grin slashes across his little face as he drives the toy toward the stairs on an imaginary road in the air.
Oh, to be as carefree about all of this as he is. Maybe someday.
“Hey, you okay?” My fiancé Lane appears in the door, wiping his sweaty face with a towel before tossing it over his shoulder. His basketball shorts and sleeveless T-shirt are almost as damp as the dark hair stuck to his forehead.
“I will be.” After a glass or two of wine. “How was your workout?”
“Great. If I would’ve remembered Jett was leaving today, I would’ve waited. We could have worked out together.” He waggles his eyebrows, and I resist the urge to roll my eyes.
“Oh, you would have, huh?” I chuckle, but seriously, how could he forget that today was Friday? These exchanges gut me and he just forgets? “You’re kind of ridiculous.”
“Yeah, well, you’re hot.” He prowls into the bedroom and tugs me close, his hands in ten different places at once. “I’m looking forward to having you alone for a couple of days.”
I wrinkle up my nose when his lips find the side of my neck. “As fun as that sounds, you smell awful right now.”
He snorts. “You’re right. I’m ripe as hell. How about I grab a shower while you do the swap? When he’s gone, we’ll make plans for the night.”
“Oh? What’d you have in mind?” Beyond getting me naked, that is.
“Not sure yet. I’ll think about it while I shower. You could always join me when he leaves.” He takes