Weaving Fate - Nora Ash Page 0,66

the fur bedding before burying his face in both hands with a groan.

“That’s… That’s why you regret claiming me?” I asked. “Because you think I wouldn’t choose you willingly?”

“I know you wouldn’t,” he groaned without looking up. “I feel every ounce of your despair. You fucking cried after I claimed you. You told us that you wouldn’t have done this if you’d had a choice.”

“Bjarni…” I put down my own bowl of food and rolled up on my knees so I could touch his bicep. “I cried because your claim… it showed me how fucked up everything else is. It felt… so right. Like we’re two pieces of a puzzle. And I… I feel so much for all four of you, I’m… I’m a part of all four of you, and it’s tearing me to pieces.

"I didn’t want Magni to claim me. I didn’t want Saga to claim me. But they did, and it was painful—is painful. Like they forced their way into my heart, and it’s rough and violent and I miss them. All the time, every second of every day, I feel incomplete without them. Like I’m missing two limbs.

“And then there is Modi. Modi…” I swallowed thickly, the pain of that bond still too raw to prod at. “Modi doesn’t want this. He doesn’t want me. With you, for a moment, it felt… so easy. So perfect. I was happy. And I finally understood what a mating bond is supposed to be like. It’s supposed to be pleasure and love and comfort.

“I cried because I realized that I will never be whole like I was in that one moment with you. Because I can never be whole again. No, I wouldn’t have chosen to be pulled apart by five alphas who are only with me because Fate has decreed it so. But… I would have chosen you.”

He looked up at me then, the emotion in his eyes so intense it took my breath away. “Do you mean that? Had Ragnarök not been here, had no Norns interfered, would you still have been mine?”

I pushed down the anguish of imagining a world where three of my mates weren’t a part of me and looked into my blond alpha’s eyes. My sweet one, the one who went out of his way to comfort me, cook for me, dote on me, even with the world in turmoil and our bond in tatters. The one who loved me simply because he did.

“Yes, I would."

His eyes crinkled at the corners, a fine web of happiness amidst the anguish. With a rumbling grunt, he moved to clasp my nape in one big hand, pulling me up and in until our foreheads touched.

“That’s enough. I don’t need anything more than that.”

“It feels so easy with you,” I murmured, reaching up to wipe at the tears trickling down my cheeks. “I wish I could give you the same comfort you give me, but I am… so broken. I don’t think I can give any of you much of anything, but I wish… I wish I could.”

“You do,” he said, moving to ghost his lips over my brow and pull me into his lap, enveloping me in warmth and woolly, hay-scented comfort. Even now, thousands of miles from his farm in Iceland, Bjarni smelled like the land he’d lived on and the air he’d breathed while he'd waited for Ragnarök.

And for me.

“I lost Arni and Magga. I lost my father. I thought I’d lost my brothers too. I would have, if it hadn’t been for you. When I hold you like this, it’s as if everything hurts a little less. As if there’ll always be hope so long as you’re with me. I love you, Annabel. And one day, when there is peace in your heart, you’ll love me too.”

“What if there’ll never be peace?” I asked, looking up at him through my tears. I wanted so badly for him to make everything all right like my stupid instincts were clamoring for him to do. “What if I’ll always be this broken thing?”

“You won’t,” he said, his soft voice taking on a core of steel. “This I swear to you, Annabel. I will help you find peace. I will be your comfort when everything’s painful and complicated. You’re not alone, my mate. I’m right here—and I’ll make sure that by the end, you will know happiness.”

I fell into him, pressing my lips to his with a desperation I hadn’t known I possessed. I wanted everything he