his strong legs hanging off the rock, feet in the water. His fuzzy knee brushes against my smoother one, and I can’t help but want more.
I won’t ask for it. A smarter girl wouldn’t be at war with herself like this. And I don’t mean to be coy. But I can’t help feeling like Rickie is more than I can handle. I’m no Carla. Any minute now he’s going to realize that I’m not half as sexy and desirable as he thought.
If I said that to Violet, she’d yell at me and make me take it back. And maybe she’s even right. But you can’t always help the way you feel.
My thoughts must not be loud enough for Rickie to hear because he lifts my damp hair and tucks it away over my shoulder. He’s casual about it, as if we always do this. Then he leans in and kisses my neck, smooth as you please.
Tingles shoot across my body. And then they redouble as he slips a finger under the shoulder strap of my bathing suit and runs the length of it, down to my breast. “Did you wear this for me?” he whispers, as his breath tickles the shell of my ear.
“No,” I say. But what I mean is, yes, but I shouldn’t have. I just spent several days wishing he’d pay more attention. And now that I have his attention, I’ve forgotten what to do with it.
But Rickie hasn’t. “I like it anyway. And I like you.” The compliment just rolls off his tongue. And I turn my chin to look into his warm gray eyes. They crinkle at the corners when he smiles back at me. “You look hot in this. But I still want to take it off you.”
Instead of replying, I just stare at him in wonder. He makes it sound so easy. I want this. I like it. I like you. I wonder if that will always be hard for me, or if the fear will seep out of me some day, so that I can look at a man and say, I want you, too.
“You’re mad at me,” he whispers.
“No,” I say quickly. “I’m really not.”
“Yeah, you are. A little bit. Because I’ve been stuck inside my own head. I’ve been neglecting you.”
“You’ve been distant,” I say carefully. “But that’s me on a good day.”
He laughs, and I feel it rumble inside my chest. “You’re not distant. You’re cautious. And you have reasons. He hasn’t contacted you again, has he?” After asking the question, Rickie wraps an arm around me and scoops me onto his lap. Suddenly we’re nose to nose. “Has he?”
“N-no,” I say.
“Good. Do you have anything else to tell me?”
“No? Why?” His gaze at point-blank range is so distracting.
“Because I’m going to kiss you in a minute, and you’ll forget whatever you had to say.”
“That’s arrogant.”
“No it isn’t.” His smile teases me. “Because I’ll forget too. I’ve got it bad for you. And I’m sorry to send you mixed signals this week. We’re more alike than you think.”
“We are?” I ask as his hand cups my face. I lean into the pressure of his palm. I can’t help myself.
“Yeah,” he whispers. “Messy lives and greedy hearts. That’s us, Shipley.”
“Oh.” It’s hard to argue with that. Especially when Rickie starts dropping soft kisses at the corner of my mouth. I’m impatient, though. I know what’s coming, and I know I won’t actually resist. So I turn my face and find his mouth with my own.
With a chuckle, he brushes his lips across mine, still teasing me as my body lights up in anticipation of more. “You kill me, Shipley.” His long fingers brush down my body until he grips my hips in two firm hands.
My head jerks upward, because I’m in a perilous position right now—on his lap, at the edge of the pool. It would be so easy for him to toss me right in the water. With both hands, I reach for his biceps and hold on.
“Hey—there’s a zero percent chance I’m about to throw you into the water.”
“But you could,” I say quickly. And I still don’t relax my grip. I’ve been tricked before.
“When are you going to learn? Pushing you away is not in my plans,” he says. And then he tightens his grip on my hips and pulls me in close, until we’re nose to nose. “Pushing you down on that blanket? Now there’s a plan I can get behind.”