Prologue
Zoey Parker’s limbs felt heavy as she tried to open her eyes. When they finally cooperated, she jolted upright. She was on a bed she didn’t recognize. Her dress was ripped, her breasts exposed. Between her legs, her underwear was gone. She frantically scanned the sheets, searching for signs that her virginity was still intact. She didn’t find blood on the bed or between her thighs.
A rush of heat stormed over her as her stomach flipped and skin crawled. Needing to rid herself of it all, she ran to the trash can in the corner of the room and threw up twice. After she emptied her stomach, she gulped down shallow breaths to stay calm. A quick survey of the room, and she found a sweater lying in a heap. She threw it on and was out the door a second later. The scent of beer hit her nose as she made her way down the staircase. Plastic cups littered the hallway and the stairs. Passed out bodies were everywhere, sleeping off the booze from the fraternity party the night before.
She didn’t think she’d drank that much. Three drinks, she remembered. The rest…the rest of the night was dark.
When she made it outside, she decided to walk instead of waiting for a Lyft. Each bare-footed step felt like it took a lifetime, and the world seemed so far away.
“Miss. Miss.”
Zoey blinked, finding a woman with a kind face pulling up next to her.
“Are you okay, honey?” the woman asked gently.
Her breath became stuck in her throat, the inside of her body wanting to flip itself on the outside just to repel the unwanted feelings. “No,” she whispered. “No, I don’t think I am.”
Zoey shook her head, pulling herself out of the memory. She still felt foggy two days later. Her skin still crawled whenever she thought about what might have happened. She wasn’t sure if it was a blessing or a curse that she had no recollection of that night. She didn’t feel like she knew anything anymore. Except that New York City no longer felt safe. She didn’t feel safe.
Laughter and voices carried across the warm breeze while she sat beneath a tree, trying to focus on writing her paper. In only a few months, she’d finish up at New York University and apply for veterinary college. All of her hard work would soon pay off. The long nights of studying, the lack of a social life, were all worth it. She missed her home in Sacramento, California, where her happily married parents lived. Once her schooling was finished, she’d go back home to her family and her high school friends. To get the life she was working so hard for. She tried to focus on that future and forget the pain from two nights ago.
When a shadow passed over her, it stole the warmth of the sun. Zoey glanced up, finding her two friends, Julie and Ava, standing above her. Both were in the same Biological Science course. On the first day of freshman year, they had all clicked. So much so that, eventually, they’d all rented an apartment together. Where Zoey considered herself more natural in style, Julie and Ava always had their makeup and hair done to perfection. She envied that about them as much as their outgoing personalities. But now, they both looked pale, eyes glassy. “What’s wrong?” Zoey asked, setting her laptop aside on the grass.
“I’m so sorry,” Ava said, pressing her hands to her chest.
An unexpected rush of heat washed over Zoey, sweat beading along her spine. “Sorry for what?” she asked, unsure she even wanted to know the answer.
“You don’t know, do you?” Julie asked, her shoulders dropping, her voice breaking. “You haven’t heard?”
On any given day around campus, there was some gossip running wild. Only this time, it felt personal. “Will someone tell me what’s happened?”
“She doesn’t know…” Ava breathed, her hand snapping out to hold Julie’s arm.
Every warm space in Zoey’s chest grew cold at the pity in their gazes. The world slowly dropped out from under her. “Please,” she barely whispered. “What don’t I know?”
Julie knelt next to her, placing a comforting hand on Zoey’s leg. “I wish I wasn’t the one to have to show you this.” She pulled her phone from her pocket and hit a few buttons before handing Zoey the cell phone and adding, “I’m so sorry, Zoey.”
One look at the screen, and Zoey’s body begged to collapse in on itself. The campus faded around her.